I've been self improving like never before, but what do I do in this situation?

50-cal · 2014-03-18T11:47:44+00:00

Walk up to him, look him square in the eye and shake his hand.

Seriously, tough as something like this is to deal with, he's done you a huge favour. Through him, all you lost was a cheating whore but what you've gained is the best version of yourself.

Also, the way I see it, is that it's secretly the biggest 'fuck you' you can give. Everyone will expect you to lose your shit and act like some whiny little bitch with something to prove but instead you'll be the smoothest, most non-reactionary alpha badass at the place. If he starts goading you however, unleash your full fury upon his fleshy little face.

Areimanes · 2014-03-18T13:36:57+00:00

Am I still subconsciously attached to my ex?

Your ego has taken a blow. It happens.

My instinct is to beat this guy to a pulp.

Why? He didn't do anything wrong, did he? He was following his natural instincts. If he had raped your girlfriend, I can imagine beating him bloody. However, she willingly fucked this other bloke. Maybe she said she was single to this guy. How was he to know he was fucking 'someone else's' (you don't 'own' a woman - ever) girlfriend?

Don't hold a grudge against this guy. As 50-cal said: be thankful instead. He led you to TRP and enlightenment. He also showed you that this woman isn't worth your time. It also wouldn't surprise me if this guy is no longer with him.

Remember: if she's willing to cheat with you, she'll cheat on you.

JP_Whoregan · 2014-03-18T15:44:54+00:00

You want to give this guy some serious control over you? Walk up to him at this party, cold-cock him across his lip, jump on him, and beat him to a living pulp. Then you'll be promptly hauled off to jail, booked, given a court date, and probable short term jail sentence and/or probation for the next 12 months.

Then, he will take you to civil court and sue you for a few thousand dollars worth of medical bills, and rub it in your face with another $10K or so of "punitive damages". That's some serious control.

It's really, really not worth it. If you think you won't be able to control yourself at this little shindig, steer clear. If you decide to go, be amicable to both of them, act aloof the entire time, and enjoy yourself being around company that makes you happy.

[deleted] · 2014-03-18T16:18:05+00:00

I see the advice ITT is good (don't react), but I'll offer my advice on why I think why the reaction is the best; it all sort of pieces together with power & attraction.

This will be simple if you've read Robert Greene's 'The 48 Laws of Power'; one of the rules is to play up to the assumption and belief of others, and in this case they will accept and expect you as a beta, but it can be used to your advantage. (Begin fostering this attitude for starters!)

Just want to mention congruence quickly. It was a word used a lot in the old days of PUA, "you have to be congruent" which is just a fancy way of saying 'don't act like you wouldn't act in the context of the situation, because people won’t buy it'. It's a piece of advice that I've used to avoid going OTT, etc.

However, and this is my point, most people will expect you to be hurt, quiet, angry, or possibly violent; they don't blame you, and probably understand why, because they would feel the same way too, but if you're able to walk up to that guy, shake his hand, look at him, even quip that you're thankful for freeing you and wishing him best of luck, will freak people out. They'll be in disbelief, and, if you remain quiet and don't focus on it, will set tongues a wagging (which you can utilise later), and it will display the deep feeling of no-fuckery, as well as impress the people who couldn't do that in your situation. Respect is there to be taken!

Remember, power and attraction are minor results of awe, and awe can be created from (personally) bad situations, as long as there's an audience seeing how you deal with it well.

Best of luck dude.

[deleted] · 2014-03-18T15:29:20+00:00

Am I still subconsciously attached to my ex?

Yes. Yes you are. Your first reaction is to want to beat the crap out of a dude for banging your ex girlfriend. It shows that not only are you still attached to her, you're willing to put somebody else in danger because of her.

Take 50-cal's advice. Walk up to him, smile, and shake his hand. He's pushed you into a self improvement lifestyle. Don't mention any of this to him, obviously, but enjoying your life is the best revenge you could ever get on an enemy.

sigmalays · 2014-03-18T20:37:00+00:00

Was he your boyfriend or was she your girlfriend?

Which one cheated on you?

ImAJerkButImRight · 2014-03-18T16:51:15+00:00

Since these threads always get filled up pretty quick with a lot of well-meaning posters saying stuff like, "Nah, bro, attacking him physically is beta/blue pill," I'm just going to go ahead and say this:

While everyone is right that it's a terrible fucking idea that will lead nowhere good for him to assault this guy, doing so is most certainly not blue pill nor beta.

For the purposes of red pill, alpha traits are whatever women find sexually desirable in men. And women are most certainly attracted to violent assholes. See: dark triad bullshit.

That doesn't mean those things are always advantageous in today's society, however, like getting yourself thrown in jail at a party.

But don't fall into the trap of assuming if something is beneficial or harmful then it must be red pill or blue pill respectively. Red pill is about reality, not what we wish reality was.

But again, bad idea to assault the guy. No question. So I'm going to assume anyone that tries to reiterate that to me didn't read my post.

Jessie_James · 2014-03-18T15:04:14+00:00

My instinct is to beat this guy to a pulp. I'm not sure if that's the right thing to do, but jesus I keep having this thought that it would feel really good.

Bluepill. It has nothing to do with him, and everything to do with her and your bluepill behaviors which made it easy for her to cheat on you.

If anything, make friends with him and spend more time with him. You'll possibly learn some new skills from him, being aware to not pick up his dishonesty and cheating skills, and also take him away from your ex.

fx-115es · 2014-03-18T17:52:11+00:00

thank him for the assist in putting you on the trp track. be best friends with him. he freed you, showed you the truth. appreciate it.

Sturmgeist781 · 2014-03-18T22:07:43+00:00

My instinct is to beat this guy to a pulp.

How is it this guy's fault your ex is a whore? How about you target your pent up anger in a direction like the gym.

Fucking 'eh. You need to change your instincts. One of my ex's cheated on me with a co-worker and I wasn't mad at him, it was her doing.

BluepillProfessor · 2014-03-19T03:54:30+00:00

Not exactly the same situation but this is as close as I can get and the lesson is the same. My wife wanted her ex-boyfriend at our wedding (he was already married and I only had Blue Pill knowledge albeit covering a mostly Alpha guy). I was pissed and quite unhappy but as we were walking up the aisle after saying our vows, in front of the whole church, I let go of my wife and approached the ex-boyfriend and shook his hand. We exchanged pleasantries for 30 seconds or so and it made quite an impression. Dozens of people noticed and later told me what a man I was for doing that with such confidence.

theycallme1 · 2014-03-21T04:55:31+00:00

Simple. Understand this guy is probably dealing with some anxiety about you being there as well. Approach him from the side and say "hey" in a stern voice and do not lose eye contact. He's going to be on the defense and expect to get hit. Put your hand out and say I'M ----, you did me a favor. Walk away. Go enjoy the Shit out of your night and don't even think about him or that slut again.

[deleted] · 2014-03-18T21:41:47+00:00

Give the guy a beer and thank him for getting you out of a shitty relationship with a spoiled whore.

mgtow4ever · 2014-03-18T14:26:27+00:00

Congratulate him on a 2nd Hand Vagina, and tell him that you made the mistake of being a SIMP. Smile laugh and Walk away.

Title	I've been self improving like never before, but what do I do in this situation?
Author	honeyimnotagigigilo
Upvotes	12
Comments	27
Date	March 18, 2014 11:42 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/20pm16/ive_been_self_improving_like_never_before_but/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/ive-been-self-improving-like-never-before-but-what.12752 https://theredarchive.com/post/12752

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