Hey guys, it's Alan, author of 64 Laws of Success here. I wrote "Forge your Frame" and "Humble Arrogance" and "Polish your Diamond" and I'm back with another post. This is a law of Attitude, one that if you wholeheartedly adopt in your life should make you less of a WHINER and more of a WINNER.

It's pretty easy to learn this Law, so many of you might know it already. All you have to do is watch how the ultra-successful talk, and then watch how all other losers talk. 99% of the time the ultra-successful all share the same attitude: they never complain, they focus on what they CAN do, rather than what they can't, they never blame others, they demand more of themselves, they never expect anyone to give them anything. Losers on the other hand think the opposite for all of those above issues.

If you already have adopted this attitude, that's awesome, but I'm posting it for some who may need the reminder or the kick in their ass. Hopefully this helps them. This post is about building your own POWER. It's not about picking up women though building your power and improving your attitude will help with that.

Note: Most of my posts aren't exclusively about women, they are more about inner Game and developing your potential and thus your confidence.

Life isn't Fair

It Never Was. It Never Will Be

Some people spend much of their lives complaining about fairness. If only things were fairer, they say.

The system is rigged.

There’s a glass ceiling.

Other people are holding me down.

He or she is taller and more intelligent. He or she is richer and had more opportunities.

I think their claims are a little exaggerated, but they could very well be right. People could be holding them down, their boss could be holding them back, the system could be setup for them to fail. None of these things are “fair”.

But the problem is that being “right” doesn’t necessarily coincide with being successful. Sometimes, the two are at odds with one another, and devotion to being right will screw up your chances of being successful.

The crux of the issue is that Life Is Not Fair, and Never Will Be. Rules are made by those in power; those in power create rules to benefit themselves. Human beings run much of the system, and humans are flawed, prone to biases, stereotyping, racism, nepotism, and whatever other –ism you want to throw in there. I respect people who make it their mission to fight this unfairness: we can all benefit from a more egalitarian society.

But again, being right does not always translate into being successful. Often, you must choose one or the other, throwing 100% of your focus and energy into one mission. And complainers and victims choose a mission of victimization, focusing on how the system is unfair rather than devoting their energy to succeeding.

Successful people treat “life is unfair” as a challenge, a test of their strength and resolve, something to rise above.

Complainers spend their precious energy dreaming of a system that will be “fairer”. Some have good intentions, fighting to make the system fairer for all. But others often just imagine systems that will benefit themselves without having to put in the hard work. Whatever their true intentions, the harsh reality is people with losing mentality wouldn’t succeed in even the fairest system ever designed. They lack the drive, competitiveness, talent, or skill to make it, whether they’re in a primitive hunter-gatherer tribe, communist China, socialist Finland, or capitalist USA. Weakness – in the form of low perseverance, lack of responsibility, low energy – doesn’t succeed anywhere.

Every single person in existence has had some disadvantage to their life. Every single person has had to compete with someone taller, with more money, a higher IQ, more successful parents, born to a richer country, raised in a wealthier neighborhood, blessed with more talent or physical gifts. And yet, there are unconventional success stories every day. You read about them in the paper, in magazines. These people are even right in front of you, sitting next to you, making the most of their limited capabilities and gifts. Every one of us has that friend in life who isn’t as tall, good-looking, or intelligent, but managed to make more of their lives than was expected.

How do they do it? Rather than focus their energy on what they do not have, they focus on what they are blessed with.

You can either learn from their examples, focusing all your energy on maximizing the unique talents and opportunities available to you, or you can focus all your energy, same as the unsuccessful in life do, on how everything is unfair and blame your lack of success on bad luck, genetics, the “system”, and other people holding you down.

A winning Attitude accepts that life is unfair, will always be unfair, and then gets on with the business of becoming successful. Adopt this Attitude and you will view your life in terms of what you can accomplish, an empowering act that gives you energy, drive, hope, purpose, and ownership.

Focus on what you can’t, and you are stuck in a trap of complaining, sucking you into an endless cycle of hopelessness, blaming others, lack of ownership, and excuses.

In fact, we can take this Attitude even further, deeper, to really extract the most usefulness we can from it.

The question “Is Life Fair?” is a trap question that leads into a pit of despair. There may be an answer to it, but for people who want to be successful, there’s no value in asking it to begin with. The answer, whatever the truth may be, doesn’t help us along our journey to success. It is irrelevant, only serving to distract us with issues of fairness that are completely out of our control.

Winners don’t have the luxury nor the time to waste on meaningless pursuits. Life is too short to ask irrelevant questions and contemplate answers that are, ultimately, useless for our purposes.

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are. The rest is up to God, the universe, fate, Allah, karma, genetics, destiny, whatever else you believe in.

Life is unfair; this is factual. Accept it as part of your daily existence same as you accept breathing air as part of being human. Then get on with your mission.

If you enjoyed this post, let me know you want to read more and I'll post another chapter in a few days