Rant/venting not sure. Two thought pattern extremes.

Shitpost-Alert · 2014-06-06T19:35:11+00:00

Consider starting a journal. This sub isn't your diary. Benefit of a journal is that over time you can see how your thought patterns shift.

[deleted] · 2014-06-06T19:54:29+00:00

There are enough fun/interesting/entertaining things in the world to keep me busy until then. None of them socially oriented of course.

&

I've made no friends. At least not social friends. There are some people at work I get along with, but don't hang out outside of work

i know i am just pulling this out of context, but these are conflicting. your interests involve nothing social, and you are complaining about a lack of social interaction at the same time, so one of these has to change. either get some hobbies that are social, or stop desiring social life.

i used to feel down sometimes when i felt like i didnt have enough friends or enough going on in my social life, but what changed was the realisation that none of that social crap was taking me towards any of my goals, and that i wasnt really interested in it. my desire for an active social life was merely born from the fact that the TV had taught me that going out and being social and having lots of friends etc was desirable.

sometimes still, i feel like i should be more social and go to join a sports club or something, but honestly i just dont have the time as i am always working on personal things (work, hobbies, study etc). so really i dont feel like i am missing anything as i am just too busy to care.

so OP, if you are sitting at home on saturday night and feeling down, consider that being drunk in a bar with a group of other drunk people aint all that great, and there are a million things you can be doing to work on yourself that will take you towards your true goals. if you dont know what your goals are, then you need to sit down with pen and paper and map them out; where do you want to be in 1 year, 5 years, 10 years and so on. what career do you want, what skills do you need, what do you want to learn? where and how do you want to live? my bet is that you will not write "get drunk in a bar, and have a hangover on sunday" on your goal setting list.

a lot of people never take the time to really sit down and think what they want out of life, and get sucked in a life of other peoples' ideas of fun, or perhaps base their desires on what everyone else seems to be doing, and those people are only doing that because they themselves are following everyone else ....

in my opinion, life is damn short, and either you are moving towards your dreams, or you are wasting your time. it may not be easy, you may trip, you may fail, but the journey is what counts, and just a few steps on the journey towards your dreams - your true dreams - is much more interesting than going through life aimlessly.

"if you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much." - jim rohn

get your goals and take some form of action to move you towards your goals every day, and you will grow inside and out. it is in this growth where your sense of self-worth and confidence will come from, and the rest will fall into place. you dont have to go out there and climb everest on day 1, just get your goals and start making steps to make them happen.

and one last thing, your goals are your possession, you are not married to them, you can change them whenever you damn well please, but you gotta have them, because if not you will never get 'there' .... ya know?

sorry if that is too long n preachy ...

variableLt · 2014-06-07T15:12:35+00:00

Learn from John Carmack (Masters of Doom, excellent read):

he had one friend and ditched him because he didn't aligned with his plans
worked 17 hours per day most of the time
didn't drink, hit clubs, etc
worked out
once bored went into the world to find people with similar hobbies as his. Emphasis on this one. He didn't wait for people to come. He actively searched for those that could help him with his hobbies (tuning Ferraris)
his wife pursued him

And he didn't complain.

On the other hand, what other guys say: being drunk in the club with people that are not aligned with your goal, leads to nowhere. Join a boxing, hiking or any other club and invite guys to a beer from time to time. You have to meet a lot of people in order for some of them to stay.

theredpill101 · 2014-06-06T23:29:59+00:00

My brother:

You're not alone. I want you to know that.

I graduated college a few years ago and moved back to my hometown. My old friends have long left, and obviously I didn't bring any of my friends from college home with me.

And I was as you are. Defeated. What's the point of it all? I read a great deal of philosophy - I have accepted the fact that we (I) will die at some point. It is inevitable. But is that an excuse for not living?

I had to have a serious talk with myself. It was not an excuse.

We will all perish - that is a fact. But the beauty in dying is the fact that you lived. The fact that you, for a brief moment in this eternity, got to experience all that is.

But did you experience all that is? Or did you lay down and resign yourself to just taking up space until you pass, and fail to experience anything?

I remember sitting in the very chair I'm writing from now, playing Fable 3, and asking myself: Is this making me happy? On my third playthrough - is this really what I want my life to be? It's taking up my time, sure. It's distracting me from staring down my problems. It's making me forget that I'm wasting my life. Am I really happy?

Over the next hour I began to come out of the fog that I was in. I turned off my computer and opened a notebook. And I wrote. I wrote about how I got here, where I thought I would be, what I want to do, what I think would make me happy.

I went back and watched some of my favorite movies. James Bond, Crazy Stupid Love, the Bourne Trilogy, the Fountain, Cloud Atlas. And I thought to myself: there is no reason I can't be doing at least some of these things. And doing something real, interacting with the world, is better than what I'm doing now.

James Bond has a great body. I can have a great body. Gosling's character in Crazy Stupid Love is great with the ladies. I can be great with the ladies. Jackman's character in The Fountain explores pre-Columbian South America. I can go to South America.

But these things take real effort. They are not done while sitting in a chair, distracted, and wishfully thinking.

And that's where it began. I started taking my workouts seriously. I kept a log, noted my run times, my weights, my reps. I learned to cook. I practiced my writing. I read books. I made a huge effort towards going to the beach or the pool every day (I live on the coast). I vowed to myself that I wouldn't let my remaining friends go - I got back in touch with them, maintained that contact, and traveled to meet them. I started going downtown. At first it was just to have a drink with myself - later I found that boring, so I started talking to people at the bar. And there's a whole community roped into that. I took up hiking and planned my weekends around trips to the mountains. I took up photography and made plans to snap sunrises, sunsets, and storms. Any time I got bored with something, I moved on to something new. I picked up guitar and taught myself basic chords online and took it from there.

Because that's what life is. Experiencing everything you wish to experience.

And when you start doing things, you find other people who do the same thing. And chances are, they want company. This is how I made new friends. Shit, once I even took a yoga class at the local YMCA. I didn't know shit about yoga, but I met a ton of great people doing it.

Motivation follows action. Don't forget that.

And you know. Sometimes I have nights where I just want to sit down and knock out a couple Hobbes on Fable. So that's what I do. But I have found that the more time I spend in the real world with other people, the less appealing games become.

That said, I will leave you with this: False Habitat.

Those animals want to believe that they're out of their cages and living natural lives. Yet we subject ourselves to our own captivity. Those animals are miserable in cages. So are we miserable in ours - we just don't realize it.

Don't resign yourself to a life of nothingness. It's a waste, and it will not bring you satisfaction, happiness, or fulfillment. Take some time, think about it, and go for it. You've got nothing to lose - your computer isn't going anywhere.

NavyP-3 · 2014-06-06T20:19:59+00:00

 -Money, power, beautiful women (not the internet fatties I normally manage to drag back to my cave)-

I don't have anything to add, I just appreiciate this well turned phrase.

Title	Rant/venting not sure. Two thought pattern extremes.
Author	I_DressBADtrp
Upvotes	5
Comments	6
Date	June 6, 2014 6:47 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/27honr/rantventing_not_sure_two_thought_pattern_extremes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/rantventing-not-sure-two-thought-pattern-extremes.16373 https://theredarchive.com/post/16373

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