I've fallen off the wagon. Before I even realized what was happening I was done for. Maybe it was the way she looked at me. Maybe it was the fact she's hotter than any of the ones before her. Maybe it was the atmosphere of the 4th of July fireworks in the air as she unexpectedly grabbed my face before I could do the same to her. But by the same time the next day I had been ghosted, left chasing her like my old BP self did with every girl I met. A scary reminder of how it used to feel.

If it weren't for this sub I may still be listening to Mayday Parade in a slump of emo sadness. That slump didn't last a full day before I caught myself. Because of this sub, I recognized what happened. Because of this sub, I have two plates already scheduled to come over in the next couple days. She should never have gotten the best of me in the first place, but because of this sub I know what steps to take. Get in the gym and work that much harder. Approach twice as many girls as I had before. Finish those books I started and stopped because "It's summer and I want to go to the beach/that party/whatever bullshit is going on".

It's been a few months since reading anything here. I don't like lurking here every day reading story after story of the same AWALT stories. But you were here when I needed you. To remind myself what I need to do, and to give me a place to organize my thoughts. So for that, thank you.