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Where does one draw the line for walking away?

[deleted]

November 29, 2013
33 upvotes
/r/TheRedPill
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Post Information
Title Where does one draw the line for walking away?
Author

[deleted]

Upvotes 33
Comments 17
Date November 29, 2013 12:31 AM UTC
(12 years ago)
Subreddit Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1rofmz/where_does_one_draw_the_line_for_walking_away/
Archive Link https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/where-does-one-draw-the-line-for-walking-away.8335
https://theredarchive.com/post/8335
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Comments

[–]jswerve386 36 points37 points38 points 12 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

If there is any clear cut examples of disrespect to you in Public? Leave.

[–]UnimpressedAsshole 5 points6 points7 points 12 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

what about in private?

[–]jswerve386 22 points23 points24 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

even worse.. If she has the balls to do that to your face in private just IMAGINE what goes on when youre not around.

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt 13 points14 points15 points 12 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Not so fast. One of the things I learned in the military is to praise publicly, correct privately. If she's correcting you in public, then that's disrespectful. However, if she's telling you something corrective, like if you went overboard with the playful busting and was really coming off as an asshole, then in private is where it should be discussed.

If I have to correct my gf about something in public and would mean I'm being disrespectful, it's beause she just did so herself. I see it as a rapport break being met with a rapport break of my own. From a meta level it's operant conditioning: she's being punished for her bad (disrespectful) behavior. Keep in mind this is for rare exceptions. Normally I would recommend treating the disrespect as a shit test and responding accordingly. My calling her out is reserved for the rare occurances where a responding to it like a normal shit test isn't appropriate or adequate.

[–]BloodRoseTRP 22 points23 points24 points 12 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

We live in a transactional world; leave when you feel you are no longer deriving a net gain from your association with her. For example, if you have an argument, it will most likely pass away, not affecting your value in the long run.

However, say, if she is (constantly) treating you in a way that you find disrespectful, publicly or privately, it is up to you to put an end to it. She is by no means obligated to treat you with any respect at any time at any place. You must be able to influence her to behave in a manner that is acceptable to all parties. If you cannot influence her to behave in a fashion that satisfies you, leave.

Make no mistake, nowhere am I saying leave simply because she disrespects you. As a man, it is your responsibility to draw the line, to set boundaries for what is acceptable. She will shit test you and push those boundaries (if she doesn't, her mental health may not be in the best condition due to trauma etc). When she does, you must reinforce those boundaries, acting as the metaphorical captain of the ship.

As a corollary, if she is too much effort (not because you are lazy, 'weak' etc), or detracts from your long term overall experience, leave. No woman is worth that much of your time.

[–]RedSunBlue 41 points42 points43 points 12 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link

Starts to use sex as a bartering tool? Leave

Tries to position herself as more important than your friends? Leave

[–][deleted] 4 points4 points4 points 12 years ago | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

When she uses sex as leverage.

[–]Dubstyles 10 points10 points10 points 12 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

If she makes you wait for sex or holds you from having sex for any given reason.

[–]brain_candy 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago [recovered] (0 children) | Copy Link

Don't forget about using sex as an incentive to do what she wants you to do and not what you want to be doing.

For example, she says "let's go home and do it" in order to leave a party you're enjoying but she isn't. LEAVE HER

[–]bluezure7465 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

If she gets into the habit, it'll never stop.

This is not acceptable to any alpha.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

As soon as her shit becomes less tolerable than the benefits of fucking her, I'm out. If she's a lousy lay, well then, it isn't gonna take much. Example: I've walked over a few passive aggressive annoying texts.

[–]redpillspeeddate 5 points6 points7 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Cancels a date within 1 hour of it starting : Next

Cancels but with no offer of a different time : Next

With holds sex for any reason that is not physical (period, over use) and just a power play : Next

I never think in stay or leave anymore, I now always just think in NEXT. Leave seems that you have lost and there isn't something else around the corner. Next plays into the abundance mentality we should all have.

[–]Endorsed ContributorLastRevision 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

I walk away when I'm not having fun anymore.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Talk/call/try to bring me out too much. That's my limit. Basically, when I stop enjoying myself and when I look at her number on my phone and think "oh fuck off."

[–]invisiblephrend 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

if her friends talk shit about me and she doesn't stick up for me. when it comes to hamsters and orbiters, there's a 110% chance that you don't know jackshit about someone else's relationship and it's none of your business to begin with.

i was chilling on the couch with my girlfriend at the time and her post-wall friend pm's her about how she can't believe my gf's dating a "liberal". i'm actually a moderate libertarian, but her friend was a shit-for-brains neocon who wouldn't know the difference. anyway, i just kind of glanced at what she was doing, read it, and said aloud, "that's fucked up. i was so nice to her the other night and that's all she cares about me?" she started making excuses, one thing left to another, and she dumped me a couple days later. it's funny, because i was about to dump her.

[–]fodosho 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

The very first sign of disrespect. I don't take shit. The second any bullshit is said or done I'm out.

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