I have been trying to get a girlfriend or ltr for 2 yrs now. I am Indian and look lean.

I have noticed a weird phenomena. I try to game a few girls here and there and try to get their number from in-person approach and online dating.

After our first date or before first date, if I masturbate imaganing that I am fucking this girl, our interaction goes downhill from here. She would not like me, flake on me, or always something happens and date get cancelled or I see resentful feeling of her towards me.

I am not superstitious or religious but this has happened too many times.

Anyone else noticed something similar or weird things like this?