So, basically, here goes an ordinary guy with no game, and no luck with the ladies. Also, I just figured that I got fed up with the way things are.

From now on, it is time for me to make some moves; as for you, I'd like to ask you for your perspective and advice - so that these moves of mine are not misdirected.

My background and thoughts

This is me: 30yo, 5'10", 160lbs, slightly nihilistic and slightly autistic, scientist/postgrad student. In the looks department, I might as well pass as 5 to 8 of 10, depending on current circumstances (working out, bad hair days, diet, etc.) Currently 6/10 (I'm not taking care of myself as I should). All in all, I think that if I improve my attitude, become the best me I can be, I might as well make it... ain't gonna be a smooth ride, though.

On my slight nihilism and autism: it was shitty childhood, man. Maniodepressive mother obsessed with her own moods surely didn't instill confidence and/or positive outlook on the word; and while the deadbeat dad didn't make it any worse, he didn't make it any better either. If you're brought up like that from the early age on (no innate filter to tell you that these parents suck), you become shattered into tiny pieces. These people essentially communicate to you that your identity doesn't matter, that you are a nuisance. It does take its sweet time, real-word experiences, and solid, re-affirming relationships, to pick up these shattered pieces, and to put them back together. It also explains why I got treated like a doormat by the ladies in my 20s, and why I held a little bitch's job for five years. I've made some progress; still, this shit gots to improve further (by my own efforts), because women still give me no secret cuddle time.

On those pills of yours: sure, MGTOW is fun - within the context of making fun of those solipsisms produced by women. I've been mocking them for, like, two months now; and while I entertained myself, one just can't expect the women to drop their solipsisms and come around. It is a dead-end, and it promotes more nihilism (and I don't want that, as with nihilism, I'd be regressing to my former self).

About TRP: I don't know, man. I'm gonna adopt and apply what I can; but as already mentioned, being slightly autistic, this does put me at a disadvantage. I'm really not into noisy clubs and empty talk with strangers. Sometimes, I would give the others the impression that I'm cold and distant; some other times, I would blurb out something that is deemed a little heavy for the current social context. While I feel that stuff like giving university lectures allowed me to push my social skills and courage, nowadays I'm just bad (and occasionally hilarious) socially, as opposed to being completely tragic (and occasionally really weird) before. If I push this further, I might as well become somewhat decent, but never great, if you know what I'm sayin'.

I see some of those so called alphas as annoying loudmouths who, in their obnoxiety, take too much space. I can imagine developing myself as the strong lone wolf type (Clint Eastwood style); if, however, I were to push myself and try to become this obnoxious alpha, 1.) I don't think it would work, and 2.) I'd probably have to kick my own ass. The question is, whether my approach (if done right) would still pull in the ladies. I find the issue complex; and yet, I feel that there's somewhat a difference between improving oneself and betraying one's core values.

Regarding "spinning the plates": what the hell of a strategy is that? I guess this may work for a man in his 20s, 30s, or even 40s. But have you thought about what comes in your 50s, 60s, and on? As for me, one day (once I have the experience to keep a woman around), I may consider becoming a man who'd like to play a long game with the woman (if she proves worthy): no beta Bob, no "let's grow fat and weak together" - more of a power couple kind of a thing. I also find it silly than women spin plates and deny the fact in front of their men (and vice versa) - as for me, I feel liberated of bullshit (and being the most congruent me) while being brutally honest in my thoughts and expectations of others (I now know that some people can take that amount of honesty, while some others are put off by it (but then, I tend not to get along with the pretenders and their bubbles, either)). I see the plate-spinning stage as practice time - it may be suitable for an inexperienced guy like me, but it also communicates that there is no expectation to take that relationship seriously. Still, keep in mind this: I'm a beginner at this whole TRP thing - so if you have arguments against that non-plate-spinning worldview of mine, do share.

Of all those damn pills, I think I fancy the iron pill the most (despite the ever-present mythology jokes). That pill hits the nail on its head in a sense of assuming personal responsibility for one's fate; it also conveys the message of doing things instead of bitching around. I like it, and right now, I'm telling myself that it is good that I'm angry - as something may yet come out of this. My so called relatives from my mother's side disgust me - they are all these (semi)depressed hippie dreamer layabouts, minimum wage, live and let live, along with "I'm sure the right woman will come to you soon enough". Personally, I feel I'm more of a guy who is up for some high adventure.

On women: still a tragedy for me. I may have improved in some aspects through the years; still, it is somewhat of a long walk to go to get above that 80% mark in the 80/20 ratio women operate in.

In terms of women, this is the ideal that I'd like to get. Hey, she's an ideal - meaning that if I acquire one that is 80% of that, looks-wise, it would still be a success well played. On top of that, awesome personality counts too (and I'm well aware of the possibility of that perfect apple being rotten on the inside). And certainly, no hags, no landwhales, no psychiatric patients - one is always better off single than that; let a man have some self-respect.

The last one I got (to entertain you): an anorectic 36yo with a pessimistic attitude. Pulled her off the local online dating site on a blind date, and it was "lady, this is not gonna work" on the first sight. I'm kind at a dead end it terms of where to get those ladies from: the local online dating sites have very poor prospects - 2 out of 10 women there seem doable, and there are lots of thirsty fools who pander to them (if a hot girl gets 400 offers, I'm not the one to take it personally when she doesn't reply to me... I certainly wouldn't want to sit on my ass for hours and read through that amount of "hey, how's it going?"), and my hot female colleagues are in LTRs/married, AFAIK. Therefore, I might as well try those approaches out in the open, or even those social events (damn, scary... but then, a man may as well do what a man may gotta do...)

So what the hell do I do?

Simply put, I'd like to kick ass in 2017 (and 2018, 2019, and so on). As I looked at the picture of that hot slut I posted above, I asked myself: "what does a man like me have to offer to a hot slut like that?" Not much, but there is a room to improve. Namely, I've thought of:

  • Starting lifting weights again. Once upon a time (must be about 8 years ago), I used to get easy gains from lifting (however inconsistent I were). While I did suck badly at other sports, this used to be fun. Nowadays, I have an average body of an average guy... and yet, I'd consider that a body of a common weakling. Weightlifting = confidence booster, testosterone booster, and eye candy for the ladies, too. Not bad at an activity at all, IMO.

  • Healthier diet (go heavy on vegetables and chicken/fish meat, less boozing around). Goes along with the lifting, overall well-being and mental acuity. No questions asked.

  • Ear surgery. Because this is the only asymmetric feature of my face, that's why.

  • Some other hobby to boot to impress the ladies (nowadays, I'm into painting... but then, I'm not so sure whether this is exactly the stuff of legends to brag about).

  • Do better at my job (currently doing ok, but certainly not doing my best).

  • Get into approaching women! Might start off slow and easy (a couple cold approaches a week), and build it up from there - go for groups, go for social gatherings, etc. Fortunately, I'm not some complete isolate (despite the slight inclination to the autistic spectrum) - and these cool friends of mine may as well introduce me to some new areas filled with new women.

Let's be down to earth here: I don't expect to seize all and know all within the first month, year, or so. I expect to fuck up, often. I also expect to go through a few women before becoming a keeper myself. I'm not falling into the trap of doing some girl's statistics homeworks for her, play "nice", and be told what a nice "friend" I am. These days are long gone. On the contrary, I eventually expect some cuddle time, and to slap that ass, too.

What would you have me do?

What would you suggest?