Hey Brochochos,

Some advice needed. Bit long but much appreciated.

In uni i was in a frat, life of the party, banging lots of girls. My SMV was high and girls always hit on me which in turn made me confident. This has become a huge problem though. I wasnt actually gaming any women, it was just super easy for all of us to pull because of the frat. It created the conditions neccessary to get laid, so it didnt really matter about anything else. As long as you didnt look like a borderline mutant, you could fuck easily.

Ive been graduated for a few years now. The first couple years i still hung around so it was fine. But im 25 with a good job so thats not really an option anymore. What ive learned is that without the frat i have zero skills with real women who arent 20 year old sorority sluts.

So my confidence was basically fake. I wasnt doing anything to build legitimate confidence in school, all i did was party. Didnt lift. Make matters worse, recently got out of a relationship with a girl who i was legit friends with for a few years then developed oneitis hard. Found out later she had BPD and fucked around on me all the time. So thats another blow to my confidence.

So anyways im starting to lift and read about TRP but its hard to be such a shadow of my former self and this has caused depression and identity issues. Has anyone had something similar happen to them?

Also, i grew up with a single drug addict mother who i always took care of and had to beat the shit out of her abusive boyfriends so ive developed a serious case of white knight syndrome. Im in therapy for this.

Basically, im wondering how to build REAL confidence and SMV. Any advice would be awesome.

TLDR: Was in a frat and ran through a bunch of women. But not because of legitimate SMV, just perception due to frat. Wondering how to rebuild legitimate confidence and SMV.