Being Mysterious and Vulnerable

mrmaldoror · 2019-01-28T14:13:18+00:00

I speak about everything I feel and think to everyone. Turns off some women but I don't care.

_the_golden_rule_ · 2019-01-28T14:04:38+00:00

Unfortunately I don't have any links for you. However, I can relate to most of what you said. I used to be recklessly transparent and direct, both of which are a total mistake even though I've had a lot of success with them.

In general, try to keep in mind that women like to figure you out. Don't be mysterious in an arbitrary way, like something you've read in a book or Reddit posts lol, but instead use humor, specifically sarcasm. This opens the door for a lot of banter and makes it easy to pivot the conversation in a new direction when you suddenly want ot shift to a "serious" topic. It's great for deflection and intrusive questions.

Also get really good at asking questions. People love to talk about themselves, which makes them think you're both enjoying a nice conversation lol. As you know, being vulnerable is easy, a natural state, and being "stoic" is a lifestyle. Your vulnerability will naturally rise, so all you have to do is either permit or deny it (Passing a comfort test? Good! Talking about a bad experience with an ex? Bad!)

AloofusMaximus · 2019-01-28T15:59:38+00:00

I think the emphasis on the laws of power around here is rather destructive if taken verbatim and applied directly. Being manipulative is not something to aspire to, and is usually done from a place of weakness. I'm a strong proponent of integrity though, now with that being said...

As to the OP question, you don't need to be forthcoming with every single detail of your life. Most men simply divulge way too much, way too soon. It's true that women like mystery and intrigue. People in general, will often make assumptions about someone based off of their own perception. With a woman you're gaming/whatever, it's often better to let that (usually wrong) assumption stand.

Inevitably the "real you" will come out in time, but it tends to work out better when that happens gradually... And often after you've had the time to lay the foundation of a relationship. To think about it another way, imagine you were on a first date with a woman, and she just dumped all of her baggage on you unsolicited. You'd probably think "whoa this chick is nuts". Now take that same woman and draw things out over months, and you have a typical relationship.

Title	Being Mysterious and Vulnerable
Author	mralick97
Upvotes	3
Comments	4
Date	January 28, 2019 1:54 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/aknmdz/being_mysterious_and_vulnerable/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/being-mysterious-and-vulnerable.210337 https://theredarchive.com/post/210337

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