SUMMARY

Became a massive beta orbiter with this girl and I need help breaking free and improve myself.

BODY

Hi guys so recently I've been reading some of the posts here at TRP and I can clearly identify myself as a beta orbiter with this girl I became close with. Before this girl, I've been much less invested with girls and how they think, more about myself. But with this girl, we became friends and I fell for her too deeply, wasn't even intended. At first I was still kind of like my old self, and we had lots of fun together, had things to talk about. Made a fatal mistake of seeing her as a girl who was different than all the other basic selfish women, and wanted to give my heart to her and put her too close to the center of my world. I confessed my feelings to her and asked to get together. She took some time to think and finally declined, but she really liked the bond we have in our friendship. (Which I thought was kinda bullshit, like if she treasured it that much why not take it further?) It should have ended there where I move on and just keep her as a friend or whatever. Unfortunately I felt really distressed and wanted to keep trying. I've been trying to improve and change myself to something different and maybe she'll like me (realized this was a big no-no after reading TRP and seddit), also going out of my way to try to please her. So now I have her on this pedestal and I've fallen too far, I basically put myself in that beta bitch position on my own will. I feel so weak and emotionally distraught after all this time, and I felt that this is the best place to seek help and reclaim my manhood.

All advice are appreciated and thank you in advance

P.S. should I post this in TRP instead? I see more people involved on that sub