Can't keep it up.

just_the_hits · 2014-08-01T19:47:21+00:00

My gf of 4+ years broke up with me a little over 3 months ago. I was pretty depressed and stressed out about it.

Beside all of that, I started pulling a lot of tail since I was newly single but had trouble like you described. Girls were hot too, was able to semi-perform but i honestly thought something was really wrong with me. It was super disheartening, and I wasn't enjoying sex at all.

Went to a urologist, everything checked out fine (except my T levels were on the low side. I'm 23. He said the stress probably reeked havoc on my T levels). I was in the best shape of my life, and he told me to keep doing what I was doing below because this is exactly how you fix ED naturally.

How did I get over it?

No more masturbation. Don't do it at all.
No more porn. Goes along with #1.
Lift

3 is the most important. I've actually noticed my dick is way bigger. You need to do full body, but hit lower body very hard. I do this every other day.

Every other day: 1. Squats. 5x5, heavy. 2. Abs. Hit hard with weight. Don't do 30 crunches, do 8-10 cable crunches with high weight. Do leg lifts on a dip bar. Do full crunches using a busu ball or whatever they call it. Do 4 excercises at like 4 reps each and keep changing up the exercises.
3. Hip abductors/inductors. This is super important. You want to increase blood flow to this area. With these exercises, don't just lift weight, but hold it. So when you squeeze in on the abductors, hold the weight there for 3-5 seconds then slowly back to neutral.
4. Cardio. I found I actually don't need to do the cardio if I lift like above. I rotate muscle groups but always do the above every other day.

The lifting will help your T increase too, which will make your libido go up too. It will also get rid of any stresses that you have.

Start doing kegels every other day. You have to train all of your muscles. Don't forget this one.

The above is what got me over my hump. I'm back on board and having great sex without feeling any anxiety or awkwardness anymore. It was weird it even happened to me because I've always had great sex. It was honestly the stress of losing my ex as beta as that sounds.

In the meantime, if you're getting tail during all of this and you still have no tail, just tell them you hurt your dick playing basketball or some shit. Worked for me and helped me ease into the situation without feeling like I was a failure as a man.

If you do the above and don't notice a change in 4-6 weeks, then you might have some physical problem. The urologist said I was doing exactly what I needed to do.

laere · 2014-08-01T18:08:49+00:00

Continue the noporn nofap. Also don't play songs that remind you of your ex.

colombia40 · 2014-08-01T18:43:35+00:00

Go see a Urologist who is a specialist in men's sexual health. Be specific that you want to see a Dr. who is an expert in this.

The right doctor will know what to look for and it helps to get your blood work done to check your hormone levels.

Keeping hitting the gym and work up to high intensity and lifts that stimulate natural T and Human Growth hormone.

Monitor your caffeine intake and make sure you are getting plenty of sleep 7-9 hours a night.

Eat a few brazil nuts a day, 4 stalks of Celery, and chug water.

Take 30 days off Alcohol. It kills your T levels and progress. More on that here: http://www.thumotic.com/alcohol-hurting/

I like a high fat diet in the morning to (bacon, eggs) More on that here: http://www.livestrong.com/article/435773-cholesterol-testosterone/

If you do this for 1 week without beating your own shit and watching porn, you should feel like a super human ready to cock punch the universe.

Good luck man.

BluepillProfessor · 2014-08-02T05:58:08+00:00

Most important: GO LIFT. Power lift to exhaustion 3-4 times per week. Do each muscle groups 3-5 sets to exhaustion AT LEAST once a week. You need to get in shape and that will probably solve all your problems. Stress levels affect dick hardness and longevity. Lifting reduces stress levels A LOT. Do it and as Arnold famously said: "Relax, you'll live longer."

First, rule out any possible medical problems. See a physician about T levels and this issue. If I went 12 days without an ejaculation I would be having wet dreams and climbing the walls. It would have gone soft all right after about 2 seconds of oral when I sploojed.

Second, those Erectile Dysfunction hard on drugs also work for your problem in many cases. There is nothing wrong with Viagra to get your confidence back but if you get an erection lasting more than 4 hours seek medical help again.

Third, what is the elephant in the room that you are not telling us? That thing you are thinking right now that you don't want to think about or anybody to know. I sense there is more to the story.

Fourth, not being able to get it up is a huge display of low value, obviously you know that. However I think it is neutral in effect (because it also lowers her perception of her value- cuz she is the one you can't get it up for) so it is not as bad for the relationship, especially short-term, as you might think.

Fifth, meditate. Read the book "The Way of the Superior Lover." Learn to breath with your lover and relax. If it happens, great! If not, make her cum another way and cuddle, letting your calm, masculine frame comfort her.

Reddthrown · 2014-08-01T20:03:28+00:00

You're just nervous due to previous bad experiences. Just relax. Getting tipsy might actually help. If it's an option, no condom also helps.

IamAwaken · 2014-08-02T01:50:55+00:00

When/if you do masturbate use a condom. That helped me a lot since I hated them before.

Besides that do everything you can to overcome the damage and recover. This is only temporary. Best to take all those songs that make you feel that way and listen to them for a day or week. Make yourself get over it. Maybe do something fun at the same time, but either way.

Try to build your confidence. Even just a mental cheerleader rooting you on helps a lot.

Title	Can't keep it up.
Author	just_the_hits
Upvotes	5
Comments	11
Date	August 1, 2014 6:02 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2ccsiq/cant_keep_it_up/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/cant-keep-it-up.141097 https://theredarchive.com/post/141097

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