It pretty much always plays out the same way no matter who the girl is. We meet out in public somewhere, and directly head back to my place for a drink.

We kiss and touch for a while, but when I try to go into her pants says she can't. And then we do the anti-ASD dance (one/two steps back, and then try again and see how she feels) but it gets the same reaction. Sometimes when this happens I ask her if she's going home now, and tell her that I don't want to pressure her into anything. They almost always stay when you say this, but not much changes. The whole time we are generally chatting and building comfort as well. And about 45-90 minutes later, after more of the dance, the date ends. And of course I respect her boundaries, act like it's no big deal, and tell her to make it home safe.

And then things remain just okay (decently receptive to texts, but not like initiating contact with "heyyy whats up!!" or anything).

All of my dates recently have been exactly like this.