Desire cant be negotiated.

sekerzitski · 2017-01-12T13:07:12+00:00

Something is missing here, bud. Based on the info you provided my guess is frame.

Let's see:

This is the 4th out of the last 5 times we've had sex that you've told me to hurry up. Honestly at this point I feel as if your just offering duty sex and dont enjoy fucking me." - no, no frame here (should have stopped at "Nah, I'm done", no further verbiage needed)

to be honest at this point my feelings are hurt cause I feel as if she isnt into fucking me as of late. - is that right? You told a girl she hurt your feelings?

Then you went silent on her, but as soon as she sent you IDGAF text you respond out of the blue (no pun intended) with comforting shit where you declare once again she has the power to hurt your feelings, that you are dumb enough not to stfu and enlighten her with RP truths that are meant to be for you only, not her.

I shit you not you handled it fucked up bad. Not "I'm sorry, marry me" bad, but there is definitely no frame in the nearest distance - you'll have to walk a long road to find it with this girl no. When you don't know how to respond, don't respond.

Lack of frame and oneitis. Start reading. And bad sex ltr cannot be considered amazing by any scale, you are fooling yourself in the first place. Read.

1NV0K3R · 2017-01-12T15:38:26+00:00

Make this quick

Holy fucking shit lmfao.

If she wants it to be quick, give her my number I'll make that shit 30 secs tops.

This is like, the funniest, most hilarious form of an insult ever.

TL;DR I don't think she likes having sex with you bud. Do you like having sex? Why are you still in this ltr?

Aaren_Augustine · 2017-01-12T13:07:39+00:00

MRP guy here.

"Ok, lets not make this a marathon"

LMR shit test you failed.

This is the 4th out of the last 5 times we've had sex that you've told me to hurry up. Honestly at this point I feel as if your just offering duty sex and dont enjoy fucking me."

Beta weakness.

I get up this morning, get ready for work and dont say a word to her.

Beta weakness. Temper tantrum.

I decide to just get up and sleep on the couch

Beta weakness. Pouting. Butthurtness.

"Its fine. My feelings were hurt but its useless to be butthurt about it. I'm smart enough to know that desire cant be negotiated or argued. It is or it isnt or it just becomes obligated compliance, which I detest."

Fail. DEERing. Beta weakness showing butt hurt feelings.

I'm at a high SMV, perhaps higher then hers.

Hell no it's not. Your lack of frame was easily toppled by a little girl.

I'll hang-out with her again but to be honest I dont feel comfortable with you being there or around her.

Failed comfort test.

I feel I scores a good female, been doing everything right, but she is just NOT delivering on fucking me, wanting to fuck me, or fucking me good.

Because, while you might look hot, you are acting like a weak beta bux. Head over to MRP. Just know, you actually will be held to a certain standard that requires you to do homework.

HookersAndBlow4ME · 2017-01-12T12:59:23+00:00

You fucked up. Lesson learned just shut up and don't explain your feelings. The only thing that can salvage this (not that you should) is dread.

vorverk · 2017-01-12T13:38:07+00:00

My feelings were hurt

Why the fuck are you discussing your feelings with your LTR?!?!?! No chick will ever fuck an emotional dependant loser, let alone your girlfriend. You have a lot to learn. Go read sidebar, learn about dread, NMMNG, and mostly keeping your mouth shut. You are failing at basic TRP stuff.

SovereignSoul76 · 2017-01-12T15:15:28+00:00

How to proceed? Proceed as if she is your roommate. If she isn't into sex with you, someone else will be. Doesn't mean that you need to be vicious or nasty to her. She sounds like a nice gal. But people who don't want to fuck you have a term: friend. But wouldn't it be fun to get back out there and run some game?! Maybe fuck them, maybe don't. But you gotta mix it up, or your Oneitis is gonna spiral out of control. As others said, do NOT let her see you sweat (from this point on...you already kinda blew that one talking about your feelings). Ain't no thang, man.

The tough part is to accept that this is something YOU caused. Somehow, subtly, you lost your frame/edge over the course of 3 years. Like a stone being rounded off by a river. Just turn up the sociopath instinct from 0 to like a 3. Stop giving a shit, and watch the pussy deluge splooge ensue.

uwotm891 · 2017-01-12T13:50:11+00:00

Don't say it's cool, and don't ask her what she wants to do for dinner. You need to LEAD rather follow. After she texts you back, respond with a statement of what YOU are doing for dinner. I get where you're coming from because I've done similar things in past relationships. Kill the ego and develop your outcome independence. Otherwise, this relationship will most likely become very toxic.

joedevice · 2017-01-12T14:34:31+00:00

"Its fine. My feelings were hurt but its useless to be butthurt about it. I'm smart enough to know that desire cant be negotiated or argued. It is or it isnt or it just becomes obligated compliance, which I detest."

All you said here is "You've managed to upset me. There's nothing I can do about it." ....

Wallace68LeMay · 2017-01-12T13:01:17+00:00

Buttslam then go no contact for 4-6 weeks

burritohead · Thu Jan 12 19:20:00 2017 UTC

The relationship as you know it has been over for some time. I have been in this EXACT situation and can say there is nothing left for you here.

She is desperately trying to give your freedom back to you, and your ego is too thick to receive it.

Leave her BETTER than she was when you found her.

Hit the gym and date new women.

Title	Desire cant be negotiated.
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	2
Comments	38
Date	January 12, 2017 12:20 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5nj1q6/desire_cant_be_negotiated/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/desire-cant-be-negotiated.182129 https://theredarchive.com/post/182129

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