In marriage for 10 years. 2 kids.
Came on this site too late and discovered
RP material.

Therefore, as a newbie, I didnt apply this the right
way, but higher dreadlevels were enforced.
Why? Mismatch in sexual libido and ways of
expression.
After nofap I realised I made lack of sex upwith porn/jerking off.

After nofap I realised my wife is a wrong match and even
RP Tactics... wont make enough of a difference to get her
where I would want her to be.
My wife will not become what I need in the bedroom.

Still... she agreed to open relationship so I can have
what I want outside of LTR and we can maintain family.

She rather share me instead of breaking up family.

Here is the thing:

started affair with a girl. But... we really hit it off.
I mean like REALLY.

Ive read about onitis.. and about no such thing as
'the one' ... but she comes close ok?

Best sex ever, laugh together, healthy living, and all
kinds of other things that could make for the kinda
women I DO want as a fulltime part of my life.
I did use RP here while working on myself, keeping
frame, avoiding shittests etc. which helped in her
attraction towards me and great sex!

Thing is... I could stay in LTR for the family.
And a lot of guys would think amazing.
Having family and fuck around.

But while looking around etc... I feel like I just want
a wife to be what I need. Not fuck random women
now & then, but get up and go to sleep with a women
with high libido and the same type of sexual interests.

So affair knows about marriage.
HAtes it. But attraction is REALLY Strong so we
kept on going for a bit.
Still... she doenst want to be the sidekick.
Fact Im still with wife is tearing her apart.

At same time.. without kids I wouldve easily
switched because I really like her and seriously
see her as someone to be with.

Even though Ive read redpill and the various books
on improving oneself (Which I am doing and is why
my affair is SO attracted to me and we have amazing sex),
my feeling says I am just not invested enough anymore
to save marriage.
Even though she allows me to fuck around.

I feel fucking confused, try to keep frame on both ends...
and am thinking about how to gently take steps towards
getting out of marriage and being with the other woman.

Affair noW says she wants to keep fucking because its so good,
but as long as I am with wife, she doesnt wanna hear anything about
our future together / how we match. And that she deserves
to be put on #1 by somebody, which she wants to be me.
And Id like that as well.

My question is
A: how to fucking handle this.
After having read it all... yes im into this ONE Girl..But is it oneitis?
if she really ticks so many boxes and I feel like I could spend rest of my life with her?

Ive experienced various women and this match is amazing.

I now do perform various things like improving myself, higher status,
dominant sex, maintaining frame. Hence amazing results with new girl.

B: Where I might went wrong is where affair asks me about marriage,
how I feel about her... about my wife... where I wanna go, if I still
fuck my wife etc. There I didnt STFU.

Guess I got in some shittests and ofcourse the 'i you fuck her, i wont wait for you / stay available for just you' stuff.
Situation got out of control too fast for me to catch up I think?
Then again... some of these things, I think, need to be addressed to
be transparant and be honest / not lead her on, since I take her seriously.

> How to find balance between STFU and giving her insight in where
I want to go with her?? / not give her the feeling that I am just using her,
but also in a tough situation that is not so easily changed.

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C: And how the fuck do I figure out of staying with her and having amazing
sex etc... wil outway staying in a less passionate marriage that is open for sex?
Because my feeling tells me having great sex with a LTR, outways just fucking
around for empty sex.
Even though it means juggling with the responsibilty of being a dad in another way.

Any helpfull advice would be welcome!

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