It's not enough to write out a to-do list or make a plan because I just won't do it. I haven't given up though and I have faith that I'll get to where I want to be someday. It's almost just like I can't see what I'm missing or my motivations illude me.

I can't even try hard enough to effectively communicate what I'm trying to say.

After years of depression I'm finally stable (ish) and at a time when I should be changing, I'm stagnant. After years of being so unhappy, I'm finally comfortable and I find it hard to care about improving because I simply don't have to. I'm on my own, no one is counting on me, I can be completely irresponsible with the only repercussion being that I've put off changing myself lol. How do I get around this?