How do i maintain frame and stop sharing too much of myself?

edwardhwhite · 2015-11-24T18:01:54+00:00

I have a rubber band around my wrist dedicated to frame maintenance. When I do something and step out of my frame, I snap it. When asked, I say I have been working on my posture because of some small back issues.

throw_em_all · 2015-11-24T15:25:44+00:00

Choose what you tell them about you, for me it's normal in conversation to talk about me, but instead of actually talking about my life, I make a conscious effort to talk about my beliefs, ideas, opinions and such instead of personal details.

They don't even know my last name but, and I quote, they feel "like they've known me forever".

longerdistance · 2015-11-24T21:32:56+00:00

Here's a curious perspective I got from trying to figure out Zen buddhism;

The idea you have of yourself is entirely illusionary, the more you show to the world that you take it seriously, the more the world sees that you're delusional, and the more they instinctively shun you.

From this perspective being mysterious is interesting to women and people in general because it creates the impression that you're "in the know". Unless you really are "in the know" this is a hard frame to hold, and you lose frame the second you start talking about yourself.

If this seems interesting to you, ask yourself this simple question: "who am I?", and don't stop until you have a definitive answer that you know is the truth. On the way to the answer you will definitely lose whatever makes you babble on about yourself.

Sir_Distic · 2015-11-24T19:20:31+00:00

Get them talking about themselves more. Turn the questions to them. Girls love talking about themselves. Plus it keeps you more of a mystery.

[deleted] · 2015-11-24T19:27:02+00:00

[permanently deleted]

mksu · 2015-11-24T15:02:36+00:00

I normally share more about myself in conversation, how do i stop doing this?

Just stop? You have control over what comes out of your mouth.

Title	How do i maintain frame and stop sharing too much of myself?
Author	Worldmap77
Upvotes	13
Comments	15
Date	November 24, 2015 2:35 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3u2y75/how_do_i_maintain_frame_and_stop_sharing_too_much/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-i-maintain-frame-and-stop-sharing-too-much.156960 https://theredarchive.com/post/156960

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