How to bounce back from getting destroyed?

TRPdating · 2015-02-01T05:42:06+00:00

I too was crushed. Married an abusive bipolar fuck up who stole money from me and shamed me to all of her friends. How did I recover?

I got mad, dude. Angry as fuck. Anger is the greatest motivation a man can ever posses. I was angry at my ex wife, and that fueled my desire to leave her, and fueled my desire to begin lifting. I learnlearned about TRP at a crucial point in my life when the only other answers were the bull shit that feminist therapy will tell you.

You know what really opened doors for me, though? Allowing myself to become angry at ME. For marrying such a worthless twat. For letting myself get fat. For stuffing my face with shit food and mistreating my body. For not caring about fitness and neglecting my body. For selling my soul.

As soon as I allowed myself to be angry at myself, rather than playing a victim, rather than blaming others for my actions and behavior, that is when I truly took responsibility for me, and that enabled me to change my life. I was no longer floating down the river of life afraid of what lay down the next bend, and instead I became a captain who charted his own course through waters rough and untamed.

Good luck.

fnordsnord · 2015-02-01T06:14:34+00:00

It's a little more complicated.

You had something great, or at least you thought you did. Then you lost it. The reason WHY doesn't really matter, it just fucking hurts.

You're entitled to a mourning period. In fact, you're not going to be able to dodge one.

My rule of thumb is to advise dudes to all for 20% of the length of the relationship to mourn it. If you were together for five years, you're probably not gonna be over it for a year. Some guys get past it faster, others take a little longer.

But if you're still moping after about 20%, it's time to get back on the horse.

Also: item 1) ZERO contact is absolutely vital. I advise you to keep some of the pictures. But pack them away. You'll want them in a few years. But all mementos, pictures, and contact information need to be tossed, flushed, or burned.

abdada · 2015-02-01T03:28:24+00:00

I would suggest reading the sidebar and then reading this and the main TRP subreddit for a few months. Go read Rollo's blog. Read Roosh's three blogs. Read Heartiste.

She didn't destroy you. You allowed yourself to be hurt. You wasted a lot of time and probably money on her. Never do that again. Never given until you have received -- and only give 2/3rd of what you receive.

It is as simple as:

Forget her. Do not accept any contact at all. No matter what. Women are good about "taking back" a man when the new guy holing her gets bored.
Always work on higher SMV. Always. As a guy in my 40s, I can tell you that I am easily in the top 5% because most guys let themselves go in their late 20s. I'm short, I'm ugly, but I am high SMV because I work on it every day.
Approaching is good, but why are you so concerned on just women? It's just sex. Sex is easy, you can buy it cheap and plentiful in any university town in the world. Focus on making yourself successful for you.
Spin plates if you want. Have one after another one night stand if you want. Pay for hookers if you want. None of these things matter if you're renting a shithole or living with parents and earning $11 an hour.

Get past oneitis, get past thinking gyny is the end all to Game. Game is about making your life awesome. Gyny is attracted to awesome guys, so stop worrying about gyny and start worrying about your tomorrow and many more tomorrows.

ThrowingMyslfOutther · 2015-02-01T04:07:23+00:00

[permanently deleted]

oldredder · 2015-02-01T05:27:00+00:00

turned my emotions off completely.

That's the only way for me. I feel no pain, no suffering, no fear, no desire, nothing.

No relationships ever again. One-night stands and easy-convenience plates only. Any trace of bullshit and she's cut out of my life. No emotional attachment ever. No live-ins. Marriage is off the table.

That's how I moved on.

Title	How to bounce back from getting destroyed?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	7
Date	February 1, 2015 3:18 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2udeu3/how_to_bounce_back_from_getting_destroyed/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-bounce-back-from-getting-destroyed.192209 https://theredarchive.com/post/192209

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