How to communicate confidently through text and make intentions known?

Hello everybody, hope you are all having a great day.

Have a question for you all that I just really suck at trying to answer. I don't know how to communicate confidently via text or how to organize a date or anything like that! Once I am hanging out with these girls it is easy to talk to them and I can keep the conversation flowing while also being funny and teasing them here and there and I know how to plan everything out and lead the direction of the date but I mainly just suck at

1.) Getting this date to happen

2.) Escalating after hanging out

For example, met this girl at a party on saturday. She was really into me and we made out all that, never sealed the deal though. Got her number, texted her today telling her it was "great to get to know you and would like to get to know you more so I was wondering if you would like to come on a scenic drive with me and hang out" to which she denied me and responded that she said she didn't want to get into anything serious right now because shes meeting a lot of people and school is quite stressful for her.

The problem is I put her under the wrong pretenses I feel like. I didn't even want it to go anywhere or for this to mean anything I just wanted to get to know her and if shes cool i'll make a move and try to fuck when it feels right. Basically, I am not trying to have any strings attached or anything. Just friends with benefits is fun. This is the case with many girls I meet, I think their okay but I would like to hang out with them so I can build my skills with women and fuck them as well. Only turning it into a relationship if we both feel the same way.

Am I just not direct enough? I have always tried to follow so many rules but it seems like I should of just been more direct and not give a fuck. I just want to hang with girls and have fun times and build confidence and have sex too. It doesn't have to be a relationship or anything special.

[–]residentlifter 1 points 7 years ago [recovered] (10 children) | Copy Link

The "text for logistics only" is for guys like you who don't know how to text because they might fuck something up by being too needy / clingy / soyboy / turn off.

Get her number. Text her right in front of her with your name so she knows who you are. Shoot maybe 3 texts to establish some sense of "I'm not gonna rape you if you hang out with me." Mention plans you have, and invite her to said plans.

Here's an example text convo I had with a girl I met at a bar. It worked on her, but results my vary depending on the girl:

You (in front of her): It's me.

Her (later): Hey me ;)

You: You were killin it tonight.

Her: Hehe thank you you're so sweet.

You: You're a beast on the dance floor

Her: Are you calling me a beast???

You: Yeah, you're a bull.

Her: A BULL?

You: A wild one who needs to be tamed.

Her: hehehe

You: I'm going to ______ tomorrow at ____. Tag along with me. You can show me some more of your moves, it'll be fun.

[–]markinsinz70 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

You already know the drill, so why ask? Did she offer to reschedule? That's a negative, Ghost Rider. She's not interested.

Your mistake was continuingbthe conversation past her agreeing to meet up. Use texting for logistics only. Dont act like a dude who has nothing better to do. The moment she said "yeah I could probably do that", you shouldve said "ok just let me know by 5pm tomorrow if you're not coming". And that would be it! You give her a deadline to jump into your schedule because you have other people you can meet and other things you can do instead if she's not available. Don't let them leave you hanging like that

You gotta let the hoes breathe. She already answered u. Why cant u just wait til Monday to talk about whatever it is u want to talk about? Stop trying to conversate through text

[–]markinsinz70 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]markinsinz70 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point2 points 7 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Mr_Queef 1 points 7 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

I get that text convo is for logistics right. you did that. I respect that. you were to the point.

It is of my opinion that the whole conversation lacks feeling. it lacks soul. it's as if you're trying a little too hard to be blunt.

each to their own man. she msged you early to bail and that's fair enough. you cant hold it against her. sometimes a person just doesnt feel like doing something. I wouldnt count yourself out though. at this point man I would just ring her and talk on the phone. you gota be charming and witty though. make her laugh. dont even ask her on a date. she will think because you called that you're gona ask her out so do the opposite. show her that you dont need her.

only if you have a good chat on the phone do you try to initiate hanging out again. my advice is to become familiar to her. if it doesnt go well then just fucking next her and start again man. dont be a pussy though and just ring her. if she doesnt pick up dont msg her or txt her until she makes contact with you.

Title	How to communicate confidently through text and make intentions known?
Author	saltyman420
Upvotes	1
Comments	9
Date	October 30, 2018 4:14 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9skmlk/how_to_communicate_confidently_through_text_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-communicate-confidently-through-text-and.136110 https://theredarchive.com/post/136110

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