How to proceed with this chick?

redpillexplainsit · 2014-11-11T00:40:29+00:00

Next time you see her at the bar, just ignore her and talk to other girls. She'll get jealous and eventually try to come steal you away... The main mistake you made was fail at last minute resistance (LMR)

aHangingChad · 2014-11-11T00:51:20+00:00

Recently I noticed a girl at a bar I go to on a regular basis, or more accurately she noticed me. (For the record: I am a pretty good looking guy ;)) The entire night she would repeatedly come over to me and ask me just a small question, give me a little look then go again. I knew from how she behaved that she was all over me but I wasn't particulary interested although she is kind of cute (I'd rate her a 6 or a 7). Maybe I just was not in the mood that night.

Good start. You've got to make sure you find a couple of other girls as well and not pay that much attention to her. This drives 6's and 7's crazy because they think they should be an 8 or a 9.

Two weeks later, at the same bar, I was drinking quite heavily

First mistake. Stay in control of yourself. If someone approaches you on a night you've been drinking heavily and you've had quite a bit already, you have 2 options. X yourself out and drink nothing but water from that point on or keep drinking and don't even think about sex.

with a couple of friends. Then at around 4 in the night, we were sitting at the counter having a good time, this girl sat right between me and my pals. We started talking and not much time has passed, she began to pretty much touch me everywhere under the counter. Drunk me, being in a much better mood than the night before, went with it and we began to make out. A couple more drinks, a little more talking and a bit more kissing then I looked her in the eyes and just said "Let's go" and we went to her place.

Good. You escalated well, though you probably should have gotten out a bit sooner. My concerns are at this point that 1) you're pretty fucked up and 2) that it's 4AM and you're exhausted.

When we arrived there, I threw her on the bed, we made out some more and I wanted to start to undress her. (Side note: We were both pretty wasted at that point) She then tells me - after a little of what I deemed foreplay - out of the blue that she thinks we should just go to sleep. Stupid drunk me, albeit reluctantly, agreed and we went to sleep.

Alert. ABORT! ABORT! ABORT! You failed the LMR test. Best options here are either to pass LMR by ignoring her and telling her that you're too wound up to sleep, ignore and escalate or agree and amplify with "You're right, I wanna go home and drink more" or text another plate who's still up.

Next morning, we wake up and I try to initiate again. She rolls with it and is very sweet and playful. I rip all the remaining clothes except for her panties off her and she takes mine off. So far so good. More foreplay ensues and as I try to remove those remaining panties she tells me that I am too impatient. (Be aware that all that didn't happen in that hectic manner I describe it. In my opinion we took our sweet time) I take it lightly, shift one gear back, and a little while later she comes up with shitty excuses like: "I think I messed up with my birth control" (Even though I told her I had condoms) and "I'm not in the mood right now. Maybe we should do it some other time". After a while of this bullshit I was pretty pissed, although I did not show it so I went full beta on that one. I am now aware that I should have just left but maybe with the hangover interfering this thought did not even cross my mind. So a bit more cuddling and kissing, then we both got dressed we kissed good bye and I went home.

Ok, so the mistakes here: you failed LMR again. See original LMR solutions in next post up. Also, don't cuddle. You're not her cuddle buddy. Call a friend to come pick you up, find some other social situation that gets you out of the one you're in. Demonstrate value and that you're in demand and don't have time to cuddle.

A couple of days later I texted her to see when we were going to see each other again. And you know what? No. God. Damn. Answer.

Big beta move here bro. You fucked this up. Let her simmer a couple days, wait for her to text you or at least until you see her at the bar again before re-initiating. If she mentioned the beta fails, brush it off and act like it didn't happen. You texting her made you look needy, especially after 2 LMR failures in a row.

If I hate something in this world, then it is not getting a response. But I did not loose my cool and just stopped trying to contact her.

there it is.

Same day I tell a buddy of mine about what happend and he tells me that this is normal behaviour for this girl and she also already had another guy with her. So she is riding the carousel now. I am not mad at that fact. It was actually quite illuminating.

All girls are riding the carousel. Some are just not good looking enough to be riding all the time. She sounds like she knows what she's hunting for and she wants a big catch. Work on your LMR responses. Actions, not words, friend.

oldredder · 2014-11-11T04:11:16+00:00

You were used for validation. If she really wanted it she'd pursue you, take her panties off, not game you like this.

It's crazy women love sex but it's like they love validation better. It's nuts. This is LMR but not just any LMR, if you give her chances to really keep going. She may not understand herself but she definitely wants to know she's high value enough for you to want her, more than actually wanting to do it.

If I think LMR is really validation resistance, meaning she's not really into it, I walk. If she really wants, she'll chase, she'll stop you from leaving, she'll ask why you stopped escalating (pre-emptive freeze-out, RSD mentions this a bit on youtube) & want to get at it again.

If not it's just a game & you're a piece of the game she's playing. Wasting your time.

IF you see her again don't snub her but don't chase her. It's her job to chase you now if she wants you and if she doesn't she won't, and you can ignore her from then on & not let her distract you from getting what you really want with some other girl.

Every time a girl exploits your time & interest this way she's denying you and some other girl who's serious the actual time you'll really enjoy together. It's very selfish of her just for emotional validation.

VictoriousNoodle · 2014-11-11T00:34:19+00:00

1&2 - There is no next move, you blew it and need to move on. Just act friendly but don't actively try to talk or give any attention to her.

3. no

4. You were both too drunk, this meant that you messed up your escalation: kino/kissing/foreplay/sex. Your description of the foreplay both on the night and the morning is most definitely the problem.

You describe the foreplay with "after a little of what I deemed foreplay" and " More foreplay ensues and as I try to remove those remaining panties she tells me that I am too impatient. (Be aware that all that didn't happen in that hectic manner I describe it. In my opinion we took our sweet time)"

I think you have the wrong idea about foreplay and need to be much more positive about it(pay attention to how her body responds and continue to do things that she responds positively to). She put out LMR both on the night and morning, you would of easily been able to blow through this if you had sufficiently heated her up.

favours_of_the_moon · 2014-11-11T02:15:34+00:00

If she doesn't wanna spread it open for you, she should at least get you off. I mean, you're in bed with her and her clothes are off, wtf.

Maybe she has some hot friends who would be more amenable.

Title	How to proceed with this chick?
Author	VictoriousNoodle
Upvotes	1
Comments	8
Date	November 10, 2014 10:48 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2lwmb5/how_to_proceed_with_this_chick/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-proceed-with-this-chick.143576 https://theredarchive.com/post/143576

Comments

3. no

4. You were both too drunk, this meant that you messed up your escalation: kino/kissing/foreplay/sex. Your description of the foreplay both on the night and the morning is most definitely the problem.