Met attractive lady. She has her little kid full time just like me, so we decided to do a first date at a kid's museum, kids in tow (our kids are both 9). She's friendly and not rude, but it played out like this:

She is a strong leader, always assessing options and moving the group, and something about this made me uncomfortable. Maybe the constant giving of directions, moreso than seemed necessary. She shares a lot of regular commentary like this

  • "That was fun, shall we all move on to exhibit ABC?" "You kids rock - ok little monsters let's move on to exhibit XYZ...."

  • "Alright guys, let's race! (both kids smile eagerly) Here are the rules.... 1-2-3 go!"

  • "Who wants to get a treat? (kids "Me! Yeh!") This way! (proceeds to lead us to snack venue)

Never looks over at me or asks for my opinion, just calls shots.

I don't fault her, but this consummate leader quality did not rub me the right way. I am used to taking that role in a relationship, and the female always has looked to me in the past. In this case, this girl pre-empted every instance where I would take the group lead. Quite well, I'll even say. But even more than that, it was an unnecessary amount of direction-giving. Like too controlling.

Also, she chatted with the kids most of the time and not me. That seemed odd too.

I conversed and engaged the whole time with all three. But I felt like an add-on somehow. At one point my kid said to her and not me "Can we go see XYZ after we get a snack?" Ouch.

She seems like a solid alpha, but I am not looking for an alpha partner. Am I responding to all of this too sensitively? Weigh in brothers. Thanks.

Oh PS - she sends me a very nice text later in the day. "Thanks for hanging out with us! We had fun, what are you guys up to Wednesday evening?"