Hey guys. I’ve been a long time reader but haven’t swallowed the pill until recently. Today I had a really strong testing of my frame and to be honest, I don’t know how I handled the situation. But I’m eager to learn (from my possible mistakes) so here goes. IMPORTANT BACKGROUND INFO. About two months ago we lost a mutual school friend in an accident. She was very close with her. I was semi close with her.
I’m writing a HUGE assignment with a girl from my school. She asked me if I wanted to work together I said yes for two reasons. Before I swallowed the pill, obviously.
- I know she’s good at what she does.
- I wanted to support her because she’s been down after the death of our friend (of course now I know, that isn’t my responsibility. I simply should had been more selfish when the assignment is that important).
So today she went to a psychiatrist. An appointment she told me about after we started working on the assignment. I pretty much knew what she would say, when after the appointment she told me we needed to talk. She’s got a mild depression which means she needs to talk some time of from school leaving me to write the paper alone (in my name, ofc). This is where I’m wondering if I kept my frame. Obviously she started crying – a shit test 99 % of the time – because she felt bad about doing this to me. I’ve been working a lot on not saying anything (or keeping it funny) and she practically begged me to say anything. I told her the truth that I didn’t know what to say. I’m not really mad at her because I don’t think anybody gets and depression on purpose. I’m more frustrated with myself because I should had seen that she couldn’t go through with this assignment. Eventually I gave her a hug, told her she shouldn’t worry about me being mad at her and instead concentrate on getting better and that we would miss her. I wrote it again to her on Facebook later on which may have been a bit too much.
I know AWALT, but should I feel bad at her, for leaving me in the situation? And did I just give her what she wanted when I said that I wasn’t mad – which is true. I guess my question is, how would you guys have dealt with this situation?
Oh, and the assignment is not to be worried about. I’m seeing this as a moment to shine.
English is not my first language.
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