Before Red Pill I was a happy incel. After some dose of red pill I started to change my life but still had some blue pill ideals left in me. I started to go on a lot of dates. All girls seemed very interested in me and never flaked (I think it is because of my relatively high SMV, I have good height, education, money, cars). But I've never escalated. I just met as much girls as possible and tried to gain experience with them: talking with them and going on an infinite amount of dates with them. It continued until I met HER. My unicorn as I thought. I've spent a lot of time with her and it was great, kissed for the first time in my life. Gradually I've developed a ONEitis for her and of course she predictably and cruelly left me for her ex behind my back. This experience completely destroyed me even though I haven't shown it for her I've just blocked her everywhere immediately. My biggest mistake - I should've escalated more and shouldn't have dropped my other options.

I've been depressed for a couple of months already and lost all motivation to go on a dates. I tried but I just keep thinking about what they are capable of and I see no point anymore.