So yesterday, a friend of mine showed me an amateur sex tape whilst we were having a chill drink. I watched for a while as I picked up a few cues that gradually rang the bells in my head.

That pitch of the girl’s moan, the pubic hairline, and the shape of the lotus. I immediately recognised it was the pussy of my ex who gaslighted me all the way to the red pilled.

However, that dick was not mine. Neither was the voice. Nor the thrusts. For a moment I was glad that I wasn’t the one to go thru the horrors of the relationship as she gaslit me constantly ever since she cucked me with another man in his 50s some 8 months in.

Then this weird feeling sank in, that she was getting fucked by someone else. And that got me agitated a little bit, for a short while.

She’s a 4.5 with makeup, and a 3 without. I haven’t been gaming and laying pipe for a while now due to Covid-19 and some short-term finances issue on my part, so there could be some influencing factors here.

Is there something wrong with my headspace?