Life story alert. I feel very strange talking about this. If this is a part of what's stunting my willpower to grow, I can't think of a better place to ask for advice. In actuality, I know for a fact that asking anywhere else, I'll find nothing of value, which is extremely disheartening as a modern male. Please, please help if you have any insight. Please.

Looking at the post in TRP regarding "mommy issues" (interesting: Google searches for this phrase bring up nothing but issues between mother and daughter), I began to ask a few questions about myself. OP was abused. I was not. However, my mother (who, from what I remember, was always protective of me and unfortunately always gave me praise, deserved or not) died when I was 6. My father remarried only a few months later. I love my stepmother. She's been "Mom" since I've known her, and I have been told that one of the reasons she married my dad (she insists she never intended on having kids, ever) was for the purpose of taking care of me/my younger siblings. She was my mom's best friend growing up, and she made a promise to her that she would be there for us. Despite the fact that AWALT, she has never cheated on my father. She is very religious. Dad is no alpha beast, but he's not some beta bitch that would allow that without a divorce, and he knows a cheater when he sees one.

Regardless of these things, and though I didn't see the implications through, my reading of NMMNG brought to my thoughts the possibility that I have abandonment issues with my dead mother. The book doesn't address my scenario specifically (dead mom), but I can understand how as a child at the tender age of 6, the emotional impact can essentially boil down to this very thing.

I'm sure others have been in similar situations growing up. Those who have overcome it, how have you done so? It's not like I'm thinking about how much I miss her. I think about it so (extremely) rarely that I wonder if what I'm asking of TRP is even valid. Nonetheless, I am at a loss as to understanding and conquering my inner insecurities, and this is the only thing left I can think of that may be holding me back.

Do I need therapy? If so, how does that even work? What could I possibly get from a therapist? I don't understand the concept, which is why I suppose I've never even tried therapy in the first place.

Why am I unable to process the hurt that I felt back then that I know is a great catalyst for my shitty, entitled princess behavior throughout most of my life that I know in some way has come as a result? I don't even know if those are the right questions, but the longer I type, the more I recognize that there is something deeply, deeply wrong with me, and I don't know where else to turn. For fuck's sake.