Overcoming Body Language

Pushnikov · 2014-10-20T14:20:47+00:00

Whenever you feel the need to do the thing you don't want to do, redirect that mental energy to another action.

For example : you want to touch your head? clasp your other hand at your waist.

You want to look away? Focus on their eyes, then smile a little. Just a TINY bit. Just enough to let that urge go away.

A lot of it is energy your mind is generating from experiencing your world that makes you a little nervous or excited. Just enough energy to make you want to move. So, you can't really make that go away, you just need to use it for something that has a better reaction.

Learn to gesture with your hands for certain urges. Instead of touching your forehead, flick your hand in the air in frustration, or instead of scratching your head, adjust your collar.

Look at something else on their body, instead of away from them. I like examining what people are wearing. Check out their necklace, or the cut of their shirt. You are still looking at them, in fact, they FEEL you examining them, so suddenly they are being judged, they feel like you think you are good enough to judge them, etc. Don't do it too much, but there you go.

In the end, redirecting the energy is probably better than getting rid of it completely. At the same time, you shouldn't be constantly fidgeting. That's bad - so if that's what you do, then you need to tone it down a bit by just focusing on not doing anything, or calming down.

oldredder · 2014-10-21T03:05:37+00:00

Feminism has done a lot to make us not want to touch women when they want to be touched. This helps filter real beta from real alpha but still causes a grey-area confusion. Last time I had the chance for a balloon fight at a bar with solid 10's I hesitated and didn't put my heart into it. I went along but I could have been way more exciting & fun. It's literally this boogey-man of going too far & having the thought of them not happy and then bouncers on me holding me back. It's against my nature to hold back. But I'm not a bouncer and I can't take 3 of them.

Not a pretty frame of mind all the while trying to hold game face & frame and go along with what should be 100% fun with a group of hot girls wanting a balloon fight on a dance floor packed with people. I was not at my 100% alpha game and that is the reason.

It's not a "beta tendency" is a serious threat my my safety which is riding the grey-zone of society vs law vs alpha vs beta vs feminism. It's ugly and I hate it.

Eye contact: I hold it with women. I use it to be engaging because I can use it to convey that I'm interested, bored, thoughtful or act a little goofy thrown in with other facial expressions. Eye-rolling or appearing distracted by something more interesting of course are options but to be used deliberately, not accidentally.

Constant tapping/drumming: try not to make it too compulsive. If it's a pace/music thing because there is music this is more natural. In fact you can start it on purpose in a way that's subtle to see if others pick up on it and do it without thinking, stop again, see if they stop - this helps you know what level of focus is on you.

I'll dismiss the broscience-nofap eye-contact comment below. Has never had an effect on me in this aspect ever.

Title	Overcoming Body Language
Author	likemynded
Upvotes	6
Comments	2
Date	October 20, 2014 4:52 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2jrb15/overcoming_body_language/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/overcoming-body-language.142955 https://theredarchive.com/post/142955

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