Lately I have enough money to experience an abundance mentality, am busy enough with my lifting goals and job to keep myself occupied. However when I'm under the barbell ready to do bench press or finish working i get disgusting memories in my head i did maybe months or years ago that were very cringey and they quite string.

Whats going on here? Am i traumatized or is it something to do with my hormone levels? Im still fairly young, 19.