The rundown: I'm on medical leave from Brown for severe depression and anxiety. Since arriving home, I've been working with a shrink and a psychiatrist who prescribes antidepressants (though we've agreed to slowly taper off them as of late). I've also taken classes at a community college and at Berkeley but slipped in both. Nevertheless, it's been a few years now and my mentality has greatly improved, but as a result most of my relationships (family/friends) have fallen apart. Honestly, TRP has been a beacon in an otherwise dark time in my life.

Now, at 23, I am working on defining my core values, as well as goals that will allow me to grow beyond my own insecurity. A rough list follows:

*Regular lifting, 1000-lb. club on the longer term

*Learn a language to C1 fluency and visit home country (French/German/Chinese?)

*Cook dishes for all daily meals, emphasis on Italian and Mexican food

*Develop a writing portfolio for freelancing efforts

*Return to finish uni. (Not sure about this one - Neuroscience major is interesting but I have not done much research yet on career paths)

*Bartending for social and financial experience

*Hobbies. This one irks me because I don't know what I should do for fun and what I should do for work.

My time all throughout high school and the beginning of college was haphazardly BP. Social anxiety has always been my biggest obstacle - making and keeping friends, and maintaining a wide social network, has and still often is the stuff of nightmares (primarily because of fear of judgment and failure). I tried convincing myself to completely shun women altogether, but I cannot escape my nature and would rather live abundantly than in denial. Despite everything, I am focusing on who I want to become, for my own sake. If you have any particular advice, I will listen with an open mind. And I apologize in advance if this comes off as whiny and self-pitying - I can assure you that I've reached a point where I will be disgusted with myself if I don't do everything in my power to change for the better. Thanks for reading.