Stop girls talking about their problems

riskrowe · 2014-01-07T03:03:49+00:00

I lived with 4 girls for a year before taking TRP, and I didn't do so well. I caved in and was nice to them all the time, and they became increasingly irritating, until I just withdrew completely. Here are my thoughts on it now, looking back:

It can be difficult being the only male in a house full of females, especially single ones. They expect you to be a constant source of entertainment and validation, and they all gang up to shit-test you together. Don't let them do this. This is war - divide and conquer. You have to play them against each other; remember they're not your children, you're not meant to love them all equally, and they're not fucking you either, so they have nothing to withhold.

As the only male you have power in this situation; they will all constantly be seeking your approval. The approval of another female means nothing, they lie to and manipulate each other all the time, but the approval of a man is precious. So give validation out sparingly, and only if they've been behaving themselves - i.e. not complaining, being fun, keeping the place tidy. If they misbehave, you revert to your default state of disinterest and playful teasing. If one of them starts complaining about something irrelevant, show her you don't care. Change the subject, tease her for being needy, and give extra validation to the other two girls so they side with you. Thanks to the female herd mentality, once you get one of the girls to side with you the others will be inclined to follow suit.

In the end it's all about maintaining your frame. Remain positive, amused, detached, and calm. Let them fly wildly all around you, and be their tree, confident in the knowledge that they'll come back to perch eventually because they can't stay in the air forever.

[deleted] · 2014-01-08T19:16:05+00:00

issue is that you're coming from a point of logic, and their coming from a point of emotion.

They're not looking for you to solve their problem. They're probably looking for someone to download their rationalizations onto, so they feel that at least someone else is on their side when they bang other guys/cheat/can't find relationships/strong woman/etc.

Kinda like being the de facto beta orbiter because of your proximity and non-banging them status.

So I do things from an honesty approach. Tell them what your gut is thinking, right when they start spewing their horseshit (make sure it's actual horseshit and she's not trying to figure things out. Sometimes there's a couple strokes of self-reflection).

In the short term, it might come across as offensive ("I really don't care about these types of problems because you're just going to repeat them again no matter what I tell you." OR whatever you're thinking).

In the long term, you've now become someone who doesn't put up with their problems, and they'll take comfort in your confidence.

Source: personal experience. Just don't fake this stuff, really mean what you say. Otherwise it's a r/seduction approach and will fail miserably, and you'll misplace the blame to being bad advice, vs. bad execution.

Best of luck.

NahDudeFkThat · 2014-01-07T08:41:10+00:00

Fuck that. You're not trying to score. Be their father figure in their life strictly for amusement. Keeps your frame strong and dominant.

Just don't stop doing what you're doing just to listen to them. Do you, you're on your path, no need to get out your way. But when situations arise where you have no choice, fuck it, let em vent. You can actually learn something, and it can help you with taking women down off the pedestal.

Then offer advice, but in a charming way of course.

I have a friend who's pretty attractive, but she's fat and her personality a little on the masculine side. Skin, hair, face, all on point. If she lost a solid 30 pounds she'd be beautiful. Great to have as a bro, terrible for romantic pursuit. Anyhoo.

She caught me one day on the phone and told me about how she can't really secure a great relationship. I listened to her nonsense, and then told her what was up.

I started with "Listen my child, I like you so I'll enlightened you." I liked this because it puts me in the frame I want to be in, and it's funny to me. Told her exactly how to solve her problem and ended it with "There, you're welcome. Most people pay a small fortune for timeless wisdom like this, but I only require you to get me a beer and shut your trap."

Those type of exchanges with those type of girls help me reinforce the truth, mostly to myself, and also helps me see things from a different perspective. And I get to actually help someone too. Win-win for everyone.

ItsYourHandInMine · 2014-01-07T01:57:52+00:00

"Do I look like your therapist?" I recommend mild douchebag game, soon they'll get the message.

toysjoe · 2014-01-07T14:58:04+00:00

Every time she talks about her problems, rework it so that it's talking about you. Something along the lines of "oh yeah, that's like the time when I....."

Women love talking about themselves. If you don't engage in it, they'll stop talking to you.

Title	Stop girls talking about their problems
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	12
Comments	13
Date	January 7, 2014 1:20 AM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/1ul3v9/stop_girls_talking_about_their_problems/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/stop-girls-talking-about-their-problems.138744 https://theredarchive.com/post/138744

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