By fresh, i mean, when you have been alone for all your life, with basically no help from parents or anyone really, when you havent experienced shit, when you feel so obnoxiously empty inside, when the loneliness gets so bad that you just dont really care what happens next... Although that is quite a fucking awesome feeling to be so relaxed, im starting to get that loneliness that left me back; dont really know what to do, feel autistic, but im probably not, probably just an extreme case of introverted behavior; environmentally forced, as everything is, but this sub kind of giving me hope and thats the main reason i think that loneliness is coming back. I assume its some type of motivational chemical response or some shit, that if i feel this sadness, maybe ill try to figure this shit out.

Dont have anyone to get info from besides places like this... Parents are fucking autistic/maladjusted as fuck, so they are zero help. No friends, obviously. Other family members are pretty useless on stuff like this.

Im surprisingly adequate at communicating though, apparently i have charisma, so thats something... Its just, when it comes to girls, and all the shit i have read in places like this, i know im not even close to what they are looking for. And so where do i start to build that up from basically nothing?