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What went wrong?

BSOG_Smith · 2016-01-06T01:09:43+00:00

Hey guys recently I tried to get a date set up with a girl I met in class recently and I followed some pretty simple text game but somehow I messed up. Anyways...

BSOG_Smith

January 6, 2016

2 upvotes

/r/askTRP

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Post Information

Title	What went wrong?
Author	BSOG_Smith
Upvotes	2
Comments	9
Date	January 6, 2016 1:09 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3znba9/what_went_wrong/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/what-went-wrong.158850 https://theredarchive.com/post/158850

Comments

[–]MasterUm 4 points5 points6 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]BSOG_Smith[S] 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]MasterUm 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

Me: Yo you me Starbucks tomorrow.

Not bad, not bad at all. However, this is best if you know her schedule (surprise! you didn't!) and know it is her style. "Met in class recently", but here you are really treating her with familiarity. Nothing in her replies indicates that she appreciated that style.

Her: What?

That's a game answer. Excellent, your time to show yourself.

Me: u read it.

This is a very polarizing answer, "take it or leave it". Polarizing is good, but you must be sure you are attractive enough to pull this, like you've got strong IOIs right away when you met her. Assuming it is not the case, I'd go with more game-y answer, ie "Frapuchino, you look like Starbucks frapuchino type.".

Her: I'm not even in _____. Why me?

Aha! "Why me" is an IOI. Game on, your previous polarizing answer worked, confidence is sexy. Hooray for TRP!

Me: Why not?

Lead, man, you have to lead. You can't just leave her with an open-ended question like that. This is confident, but realistically too much. You can expect her to follow, but you got to lead. Any simple gamey answer would do, I suggested one in my original reply for example, the key here is low investment and abundance mentality. Wit also helps (noone wants to go on a coffee date with a stuck-up dude). For example: "You seemed like an easy target". Also a great setup to serve some mystery: "Shame, now you'll never know".

Her: Idk

Passing the ball back to you with zero investment.

Me: So ys?

Keep pushing, RP, confident. One more step in that direction and it will be neediness, but this one is still ok. Insensitive (she's dodging, you are pushing), but still bearable. Also, why the hell did you skip "e".

Her: what's ys?

"Game me, game me some more!". Playing dumb. Now you are in a damage control mode.

Me: Figure it out.

"Not playing your games. Yes or no?" Look at that guy he's either really confident or really desperate, I can't tell.

Her: Okay Her: That's not going to happen though so keep waiting.

No opportunity for plausible deniability, the guy is clearly not into text game, I'll not be there tomorrow - time to bail. You left her with a choice to either pursue you (before first date? Are you THAT good looking?) or bail. She bailed.

Me: Okay. Her: bye.

Conclusion: definitely very RedPill, but didn't work on the basis of your high SMV alone. Lacking PUA skills. I'm not saying you should go PUA route (maybe its best if you don't), but hey, you asked. Also, just by a virtue of being red pill, you didn't reduce your future chances with her. You showed direct interest right away, didn't bend, didn't loose frame. So this still might pay off in the future. When you meet her again, don't be apologetic, be proud, or better yet pretend this exchange has never happened. You made her feel special by asking her out, didn't waste her time, didn't produce negativity. Overall, not the worst outcome.

[–]BSOG_Smith2 points 10 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]throw_em_all 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]BSOG_Smith[S] 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]throw_em_all 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]MasterUm 0 points1 point2 points 10 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

While your first comment seems correct to me (I basically said the same thing above), these examples you give seem worse than op's original style. In the long-term, confidence is always better, and in his original conversation op never crosses into arrogance or aggressiveness.

Hey I'm doing X on X, are you free?

Weak. You have to bravely indicate interest right away, get them feels going, don't make her think about logistics right out of the box. This is good for 3rd date, maybe.

Are you free any of this week? Thinking of doing X activity

Insecure, instant focus on logistics, indecisiveness, attaching yourself and your plans to her availability. Not usable in romantic context. I'll reiterate, this is really bad.

Doing X on X you're welcome to join

Strictly platonic friendship. Not usable in romantic context. How is that aggressive? That's really passive and safe. Safe is bad.

Hope that helps.

[–]throw_em_all 1 point2 points3 points 10 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Weak. You have to bravely indicate interest right away, get them feels going, don't make her think about logistics right out of the box. This is good for 3rd date, maybe.

In my book interest has to be indicated right away too, indicating it while texting is late as fuck, if I get this number from her in person, then I express my interest before getting it, so she knows whatever I text is in the context of dating. If I get it on dating apps it's implicit, almost the same as if I cold approach, but again plausible deniability, so I rather double check expressing interest even if we already dry humped in the club.

Insecure, instant focus on logistics, indecisiveness, attaching yourself and your plans to her availability. Not usable in romantic context. I'll reiterate, this is really bad.

Again, logistics is my point while texting, she already knows why I'm talking to her, there's no need to beat around the bush. Also I am attaching my plans to her availability because unless she's 18 yo, she either works, studies or both at the same time, I'm not talking out of my ass here, I've been experimenting with this shit for over 6 months now, 80% of the time I set a date and time, she's not available and doesn't offer an alternative, now I either next them or ask again, if I ask again then I've asked twice, which is still more commitment than just asking once.

Strictly platonic friendship. Not usable in romantic context. How is that aggressive? That's really passive and safe. Safe is bad.

It's aggressive because you're not giving any options, again people here talk about texting like every single women you ask out or text have been chasing your dick for months like it's the cure for cancer, in reality, or at least in my reality, women I date are under my SMV because hypergamy, and interested because I do get the number and stupid stuff like IOIs, however they're not thirsty for my dick if I can't make them be, and I can only make them if I get the date, after they show up it's easy game, meanwhile my focus is to get them to show up.

Doesn't mean that I will beg for her time, but most times I won't be able to pull off the "come suck me dry" text.