What's so difficult about seeing and believing?

[deleted]

August 11, 2013

4 upvotes

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Post Information

Title	What's so difficult about seeing and believing?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	4
Comments	17
Date	August 11, 2013 10:37 AM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/1k4zx5/whats_so_difficult_about_seeing_and_believing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/whats-so-difficult-about-seeing-and-believing.196567 https://theredarchive.com/post/196567

[–]frechet175 points176 points177 points 13 years ago (49 children) | Copy Link

I've posted an outsider's perspective before in TheRedPill, but have since been banned from posting. I think the ban had more to do with me also subscribing to TheBluePill, but whatever. Who am I to judge the policies that you guys enact to foster an open exchange of ideas.

TheRedPill is one of my all-time favorite subreddits because I am an avid people-watcher. I love reading your posts. I've shared them with others (some of them female). The "pill" itself has no effect on me. The disconnect between what many women say they want and what they actually want is old news. Such disconnects are not unique to women. I've had bosses, male friends, students, and homeless panhandlers contradict themselves on what they want from me. It's a human condition that you guys only attribute to women because your entire lives seem to revolve around the fantasy of conquering this one thing that has created this debilitating sense of inadequacy.

It's not difficult for me to understand the ideas of the red pill. What is difficult for me to gauge is whether any of you are even remotely aware of the fact that your entire philosophy is an elaborate (and completely transparent) defense mechanism to mask the massive insecurities that have hobbled your romantic life in the past.

It doesn't matter how many behavioral research papers you cite to defend it. There is this notion that a male should have as many partners (or "notches" as you refer to them) as he can, but a woman who seeks male attention to boost her own self-esteem is not as worthy as a chaste one. Any one with half a brain can see that this is an attempt to compensate for the fact that you feel threatened by other males who you are competing with.

This subreddit is not a forum for new ideas and a new perspective on the world of sexual dynamics. This sub is a support group for men dealing with a sense of inadequacy. And like most support groups, you exchange stories (referred to as "field reports") and discuss your ongoing difficulties (referred to as "ranting/venting").

But again, keep in mind that I love this subreddit. I'm considering unsubscribing to TheBluePill because they're a bit boring. But you guys...you guys are pure entertainment.

[–]soapjackal9 points10 points11 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Youbanistan 3 points3 points3 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]soapjackal3 points4 points5 points 13 years ago [recovered] (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]puaSenator11 points12 points13 points 13 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link

Let me explain how I personally see TRP, as an active member:

TRP used to be a GREAT place, but has since descended into a swatch of insecurity, which I'll explain later. TRP is more about the differences between men and women which are inherent. People that subscribe to the TRP philosophy feel like masculinity in our society has been assaulted, while feminism is the dominant polarization.

Original TRPers aren't against women being equal under the law, getting a fair shot in life, or doing whatever they please. Instead, they are against being forced to feminize themselves and told masculinity is something that's toxic. Many women truly believe this and actively say they want more caring, passionate, and sensitive men. So men have in turn done just that in hopes of catching a woman. However, women's actions are saying the exact opposite. While they say they want a feminized man, they clearly chase after the masculine man.

Now that there are less masculine men, women complain, "Why can't I find a good man these days?" and men complain, "I'm doing just what they ask, but no woman wants me. Why is this?" Now both parties are confused and frustrated.

So TRP comes in to sort of be a pill of truth. Men need to be masculine again. It doesn't mean being a dick and asshole, it just means embracing your masculinity and acting like a man -- which leads to women falling for you. Because at the end of the day, this masculinity triggers their biological and inherent desires to be with a MAN not a man that acts like a woman. If woman wanted a woman, they'd just date woman and fuck men if they wanted dick. But they don't. They want men. And that's exactly what TRP is trying to teach.

And on a related side note, TRP also discusses the dynamics that come from men and women having different "primes". Women hit their prime in their young years of 20-30, while men hit their prime starting in their early 30s. So again, a lot of frustration comes up. Men in their early 20s are pissed they can't get the hot quality women they desire, because all the hot women are going for older dudes. But soon as they hit 30, now they are the ones having all the sexual fun. The frustration comes from the fact that woman at this same time are now hitting their sexual prime's wall. So they'll start frantically try to get married, have kids, and so on, before their physical beauty goes away. So they'll try to latch onto a guy their age as quick as they can. This upsets a few guys because they find it as not fair. How come the women get to have all the fun with their sexual prime, but the guys are not allowed to have fun in their prime? But this is not really realted to the point. I'll carry on.

Now, the downsides and unfortunate reality. After TRP started getting big, it started attracting a wider and less informed audience. TRP started more as a grad level course after seduction. More about people that already know how to get with woman, but want to now learn about themselves and become a better man. Unfortunately, the noobs came in.

Many of these new guys are just frustrated chumps with emotional issues. They got burned by woman in the past, and are confusing being a man with being a dick. They feel like TRP gives them justification to hate women. I've seen it so MANY times: Guys calling women nothing but whores, fuck holes, and bitches. This isn't TRP by any stretch of the imagination. This is a frustrated dude who hates women, and thinks this community is a place to pretend to be some chest pounding sociopathic jock. Every day, I see more and more of it. It's NOT TRP. It's a shame. The problem is, outsiders are now seeing a lot of these stupid insecure beta's in alpha clothing comments upvoted, so they naturally think this is what this sub is trying to teach. This isn't the case, but I understand why. With the massive wave of of these pretend "men" here, they are all upvoting each other's sexist and insecure comments. Meanwhile, most of the real TRPs have either given up on the sub completely, or rarely participate any longer.

I used to contribute here all the time. But then I started getting more and more responses such as, "Shut the fuck up beta fag! If you care so much about her emotions, you may as well just cut off your dick" which will be upvoted, and I'll be downvoted. These guys think being confrontational and aggressive == confident and willing to assert their opinion (masculinity =/= insecurity masked in aggression). They think this childish behavior is manly. But it's not. They are just acting like the bullies that bully'ed them in HS, and for some reason think that's what it means to be an independent and confident male.

I just want to reiterate, you are right in one sense that "This sub is a support group for men dealing with a sense of inadequacy." but TRP isn't about that. It has unfortunately become that. It used to be exactly how you were saying, "a forum for new ideas and a new perspective on the world of sexual dynamics."

I've petitioned to the mods countless times to start getting strict on the sexism and the guys that just are frustrated with women because they don't know how to control their emotions. But they claim not to want to do that, and instead want the community to grow in whatever direction it wants to go. I obviously disagree with this, because it's gone so off-rail, that it has to be forced back on track.

[–][deleted] 6 points6 points6 points 13 years ago | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points1 points 13 years ago | Copy Link

[–]neXianXavia1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

This rings absolutely true for me. I joined TRP at 5.5k members, and I never really thought of it as a support group for men masking insecurity about previous relationships, I thought of it as a way of cutting through bullshit and giving me some actual legitimate knowledge about relationships when everything else seemed to not make sense. Hell, before I picked up TRP I didn't even have relationships, but there was going to be a time where I 'got lucky' with some lady and then provided for her.

I see it as a way of improving, and making sure you avoid stupid potholes with women. Those two things are separate, but overlap.

The thing about TRP is I absolutely apply it in my life. I don't just go to the subreddit and bitch about how shitty women are like a whole ton of silly people on TRP do, but I take almost everything posted into consideration as 'things that can happen'.

The mods don't want to censor it because the people that find TRP and have been decieved for a large portion of their life have a phase where they absolutely get mad. I was damn pissed when I realised all I had ever been doing my whole life was providing for other people's insecurities for no reason other than to be a nice guy.

[–]puaSenator1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link

I understand, and I think they definitely have a right to be mad. Personally, I want to share TRP knowledge. And when someone new comes here and just sees a bunch of frustrated dudes spouting sexist shit, it frankly scares a lot of people away. A bunch of people that could greatly benifit from this information and have their life and their future SOs life changed for the better, are running away and spreading negative information throughout Reddit about how terrible the sub is.

If you're pissed off after learning that women say one thing but act in another way. That you've spent your life listening to them and doing your best to live up to what they've said, only to find out you were fucking yourself over. Get mad, be upset, then realize that everyone is human, and that's just how the world is. Men are doing similar things to women but in different more obvious ways. Refrain from posting and making the sub bad until you've fully swallowed the pill and have come to terms with it. Instead of being reactive, be proactive.

[–]Modredpillschool1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Modredpillschool[M] -3 points-2 points-1 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Modredpillschool[M] 4 points5 points6 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]redpilldude-1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[+]roe_-30 points-29 points-28 points 13 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link

This sub is a support group for men dealing with a sense of inadequacy. And like most support groups, you exchange stories (referred to as "field reports") and discuss your ongoing difficulties (referred to as "ranting/venting").

If this is true - it probably is, after a fashion - the obvious (to me, anyway) questions would be:

Why are there upwards of 10,000 men who have this sense of inadequacy*?

Can you be explicit about what, exactly, the members of TRP feel/felt inadequate about? (You hint at it with:

There is this notion that a male should have as many partners (or "notches" as you refer to them) as he can, but a woman who seeks male attention to boost her own self-esteem is not as worthy as a chaste one. Any one with half a brain can see that this is an attempt to compensate for the fact that you feel threatened by other males who you are competing with.

But this is not a statistically accurate statement about the actual beliefs of our members wrt high partner-count women.)

What are the common factors in all these men's experience that caused this sense of inadequacy?

How did it come to be that these men feel they have to swap stories/theories or join a support group to navigate their interactions with the opposite sex?

(* - You might claim that 10,000 is an inflated figure. Here )

[–]Easiness1035 points36 points37 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[+]roe_-11 points-10 points-9 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Rusty5hackleford 26 points26 points26 points 13 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link

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