Recovering nice guy here. I think I have read tidbits of this in the sidebar (and point me in the right direction if I'm wrong), but I'm confused when to be "nice." Either in plate or LTR scenarios.  

I know there has to be some Beta percentage for comfort after awhile, especially in LTR, but I am confused specifically when and how to let this out.  

If she asks for help with something for example, at some point I'd want to help her, yes? But how to manage the slippery slope when that behavior is reinforced and she keeps asking for help with stuff. Do I only do it as a reward? Because at some point in a LTR especially, you have to help her with shit when she asks, yes?  

I'm confused on little things too- like if we go to a restaurant and are finished eating and we have to bring our trays to the front, am I "losing Frame" by taking care of both of our messes? Do I lose value in her head by doing this? Seems Beta and chump-ey in a way but also could be seen as taking the lead?  

I've read No More Mr Nice Guy and (I think) all of the sidebar a couple times over. It's these little things I'm still unsure about, because I know they can add up almost immediately.