"Is it better to have loved and lost than to never loved at all?"

​

I found the red pill after years of anger and confusion with woman, looking for a solution to the common issues men face in today's world. Oneitus had destroyed me many times in the past few years. A lack of understanding, cheating and disloyalty, and my own desperation to 'get good' with woman pushed me down the amazing path of unplugging and rewiring laid out here. I started spinning plates, worked to improve my SMV, and focused on my other goals in life. I loved the results, loads of self improvement and gained better control over this area of life.

​

Then met a unicorn, and reacted how I thought I should. I plated her, gamed her no different than any other woman and was very aware of the illusions I was falling for. Every day I reminded myself of AWALT, managed my thoughts and stayed true to my path, constantly vetted her. No amount of red pill knowledge, practice, or previous self reflection prevented me from falling for her. After a few months I decided the trade off of exclusivity was worth it, and began a LTR. I acknowledge my failures and shortcomings in the relationship that led to its demise, but cant help but wonder if the true mistake was entering the relationship itself to begin with.

​

I had memorized the sidebar, spent countless nights working on game, and building myself into a man I was happy with before going into it. Exclusivity, and starting the long process of building a LTR, just doesn't seem to be worth it in the long term. It was great while it lasted, and of course I ultimately must vet for longevity and maintain my side of things, but I cant shake the notion that any form of exclusivity is doomed from the start or at the least carries far to great a risk.

Im getting back to the good old lift, sidebar, and spin plates. BlackDragon and Humansockpuppet write some great content, i'm looking for more material to delve into. I'd love to hear others thoughts or input on this conundrum. Any good recommendations or other blogs that can help me move past this mental roadblock?