hi, 25m virgin, decent looking nothing fancy, just good average, i run a small business & produce music, i hit the gym to get big (way too skinny for my age, i look 16, im bulking since 2months).

the first 21 years of my life i either spent in hospital or home, i never really was interested in friendships or found people "like-me", i still have friends that ive made, but its very rare and they dont have time often, they also all have gf so theyre not interested in going to clubs/bars often. due to my conditions i work from home, so i have no social circle from school (i honestly dont want to spend time with them, ill be forever that "sick" dude to them) or university (probably heaven for rp-guys), im selfemployed and work mostly from home. the last 4 years i tried to get a "basic" life, finally get a drivers license, own crib, etc.

i know life blew past me and i cant turn the time back, im mostly fine with that, its life, thats just how it is now.

i really dont know where to start, i feel lost, i know rp isnt about fucking girls its about getting somewhere in life and to become that man, and im on that path but im still lost cause i have no real friends, no close circle i really enjoy spending time with, i crave to finally smash, i wanna meet girls, but without friends thats not possible, i wanna meet new people but where tho? in my age everyone has their peers and you either enter that group and be somewhat of a "contentcreator" or nobody cares and you dont understand anything cuz most stuff is "insidertalk" , and i also dont have insane social skills, i spent most of my life alone at home or in the hospital, im good in small groups but 5+ people and its just too much going on.

what am i supposed to do? i feel lonely, ive gone through so much shit, i feel insanely strong and at the same time small like an ant.

you only have 1 life, im working on turning it around 180° but i need some guidance, i wouldnt describe myself as a niceguy or beta, im just inexperienced in all regards and who wants an inexperienced 25 year old?