In the beginning of my LTR I was a weak beta faggot. No lie, I was 18, and I was going through a really rough time in my life. Before I started dating my LTR I was probably sleeping with a new girl every weekend or so. I met my LTR and for some reason I was ready to actually date and have a meaningful relationship, I wanted to stop partying as much as I was and take on a little bit more responsibility. Anyways, I realized quickly the difference between being close with a girl and just fucking and hitting them up occasionally was vastly different. I thought “compromise” “talking things out” “emotions” and “selfless love” were the keys to a good relationship. You guys know where this is going. The first 6 months were pure hell, my family was facing bankruptcy, I was weak and vulnerable with no direction in life and she was young and 17. My SMV went down and betaness increased. I caught her multiple times talking to other guys, but mainly to garner attention. Two that stick out were her talking to her friend about wanting to fuck another guy, and her texting him trying to hang out with him alone while I was gone for the weekend. I’m owning this shit because I don’t even recognize the person I was back then anymore. I ended up sticking through it because I “loved her”I read trp, got my shit together, got back in the gym, took control of my relationship, started college classes and I feel better than I ever have, look better than I ever have, and I have bitches asking for my snap often, flirting, etc. The last 9 or so months have been great with my LTR and I’ve righted the ship. Never had a better relationship with her than I do now. She knows I can leave at any moment and be with most whoever I want, and she craves my attention, craves sex from me, and does almost every little thing right now. It’s overall a great relationship now, but those 6 months stick out to me still, how she acted, how disrespected I was. I own it and say it’s my fault for being such a weak faggot and I deserved it, but the thoughts still come every now and then and I burn up sometimes. Sometimes I catch myself wanting to fuck that girl that keeps trying to get my attention at work, or the cute blonde in my English 2 class that I talk to a lot and I always catch staring. Basically, what do I do about these thoughts? I find cheating immoral, there’s no problem with my current LTR but the past, and I’m moving forward. Do I just need to let this shit go, accept it was my fault and move on? (Also, no I don’t think she’s a “unicorn” or anything like that, those glasses fell off the hard way, the only thing that’s kept me is she’s complied with EVERYTHING, and I mean some of the things she’s done for me have been outrageous without me asking. I’m getting fucked 24/7, but another big factor is the time investment)