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[–]bl1y 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
It may be that she is asexual. It may be that she simply has a very low sex drive that will awaken later on in her life. It may be that she actually is sexually attracted to people, but has some psychological hangups getting in the way, so she wants to be asexual to dodge those issues (think about gay men who marry and have kids with women).
Whatever it is though, no, it is not a shit test. It's not even really an IOD either. I think of an IOD as something like being bounced from the line outside a club. In this case there's no club, no line, no velvet rope, and no bouncer.
[–]jrc123451 points 12 years ago [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link
So youre saying its not me. Its her. The alpha in me really wants to take this as a challenge and show her otherwise. Not sure if thats alpha, or coming from a scarcity based mindset (fuck you oneitis!)
[–]bl1y 6 points7 points8 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It's neither alpha nor scarcity mentality. You're just being self-centered. It really isn't you, it's her. Her sexuality has absolutely nothing to do with you.
It's easy to look at the world and see it in terms of how it fits into your life. What does this response from this girl mean for me? But the reality is that you're not the center of the universe, you're nor Earth's protagonist. Her issues exist completely independently from you.
[–][deleted] 12 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]jrc123451 points 12 years ago* [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
For sure, what you're saying makes sense, but I'd like to test the waters more in this situation before writing her off completely. I say this because her comment on this came outta nowhere (not a response from any form of escalation st the time), and I also get the feeling this may be a tactic that she employs when shes scared of getting into a relationship due to her lack of experience.
That and why not try?
Regardless, if she truly is asexual, then I know what to do. Back off, find someone else. Thanks!
[–][deleted] 12 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]bl1y 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Celibacy is generally a conscious choice, I was referring to the possibility that there's some subconscious hangup. And that was a possible alternative to asexuality, not an explanation of asexuality. See how the first part of my comment was "It may be that she is asexual"?
[–]witchdoctorpixie 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm not sure about her case in particular, but I believe it is real.
Here is an interesting quote from a study: (I can provide the source if you're interested in further reading)
" That the asexual brain may too be structurally different should not be too easily dismissed. The existence of animal displays of asexuality run contradictory any suggestions that asexuality is a problem caused by psychological issues such as fear of commitment, or conscious/unconscious repression of sexuality, as animals are presumed to be incapable of both, although this rests upon the assumption that asexuality has the same cause in humans and animals. "
[–]SpaceCatNinja 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It can be true.
But even if it weren't, it's a pretty big sign of her rejecting you. She isn't interested either way.
[–]puaCurveBall 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Commonly cited studies put asexuality at 1% of population.
[–]puaCurveBall[M] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This belongs in /r/askseddit as it is asking advice for a specific situation / girl
This will stay in spam filter, please repost in the AskSeddit subreddit.(Not askREDDIT, but askSEDDIT) Please read RULES & GUIDELINES. This post is answered by many SIDEBAR guides.
I would also recommend reading 10-20 of the top posts on Seddit: FOUND HERE
Also, don't worry about it! You didn't do anything wrong since you didn't know
[–]StarEaters 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
A couple of drinks in her will prove her wrong
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[–]bl1y 3 points4 points5 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]jrc123451 points [recovered] (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]bl1y 6 points7 points8 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]jrc123451 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–]bl1y 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]witchdoctorpixie 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SpaceCatNinja 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]puaCurveBall 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]StarEaters 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link