This girl is basically what drove me to find this community. We lived near each other in college and spent a lot of time together a couple of summers ago, but I never made anything happen because I was completely clueless about game. I honestly feel like if I had this knowledge back then, we could have had a great relationship.

I've been over it for a while, but she still talks to me every once in a while. Says how we need to catch up, that she wants to see me again, etc. I would want to hang out but she has a BF (who she lives with) and I'm not interested in the friend zone. I always come up with excuses when this happens.

But next week she's having a get-together at her house for her birthday...BBQ and pregame before heading to a bar. I'm not sure how to handle this. I can't really be as evasive about it. I've done a good job of avoiding her. I don't think about it her anymore but I still want to leave the possibility open that she could come back into my life later on down the road. I feel like if I don't go to this it's going to look bad, plus I would feel a little guilty about it. She'd probably actually be a little hurt if I didn't.

I'm thinking I should just suck it up and go, and just talk to her friends if any of them draw my interest. Or just talk with random girls at the bar. Thoughts?

EDIT: Some more info. I had a huge crush on her and she definitely knew about it. I handled it in extremely beta ways...like asking her to talk about it... cringe. I haven't seen her in about a year and a half. But I also initiate conversations with her...rarely, like every 4-6 months probably, just to talk about each other's lives. I know this is a bad idea but yeah...I haven't done it lately (since I started actively practicing this stuff.) Also we'll have mutual friends there...it'll be noticeable if I'm not there. And I'm not sure how that would look. I just feel kind of obligated to go. Blah.