First of all let’s get into why most people misunderstand the idea of what a bad boy is, and why most women off the face of the Earth are insanely attracted to this archetype.
Society thinks a bad boy is a guy that has this negative aura around him, who is misbehaving, maybe even breaks the law, and is mistreating women while being an asshole. That is so far away from the truth. In reality, what a bad boy actually is, is a guy who’s independent, doesn’t follow the trends, he’s not necessarily looking for trouble but somehow women sense an intriguing vibe about him.
Ever wondered why that happens? And it’s not because he’s an asshole or he’s mistreating women. Not at all.
It’s because he is CHALLENGING.
Women absolutely love that about a guy. It implies that she’s not really sure whether or not he likes her, and that makes her want to give her power away and start chasing him.
Because a guy like that kind of challenges her sense of reality and beliefs, she might open up to seeing new ways of thinking she might take into consideration, which will break down any resistance she might have for him.
Another reason why a guy like that is attractive, is because he doesn’t really care. But not in the way you would think or in a way that he neglects the girl. He doesn’t care because he cares about the right things for him. Take for example Brad Pitt’s character in Fight Club. He had this not giving a fuck type of vibe about him, but that was because somehow, in some idealistic way, he had his strong principles he DID care about. Another way of saying it is being a man that is holding his ground. And paradoxically that makes you so engaged with the girl, and at the same time make her feel that she doesn’t own you.
Being a challenging guy is about being bold and playful which will create some tension without making the girl feel uncomfortable. You will naturally start to feel like playing around with her feminine energy, giving her compliments, joking around with her, teasing her with something about her personality. All that without trying to lower her perceived value of who she is and how she views herself as a being. Be an instigator of fun. Start generating your mindset of abundance, where you don’t need anything from anyone. Fully open about expressing interest, without needing to chase the girl.
What being CHALLENGING is not
Let’s talk about what being CHALLENGING is not.
It’s not about being an asshole. Girls don’t like them. And I will explain a few asshole moves that ALL women think are sleazy and just lame.
- Teasing doesn’t mean insulting. This will not bring the interaction somewhere productive at all. Don’t make any negative comments based on features about herself that she cannot change, like “Ugh, your nose is weird.” That is just really bad because you’re violating fundamental social norms and you will just come off as plain insecure about who you are.
- Trying to bring her perceived value lower, or to elevate yours. She will smell what you’re doing from miles away, and figure out you’re trying to pull a technique on her. It becomes quite obvious that you are trying to get to sex, without being open about your intentions. It’s manipulative and you’re showing you have an agenda behind your actions, and that will make the girl feel really uncomfortable about you and probably lose her. And rightfully so.
- Having misogynistic beliefs. Women will always feel if you don’t have their best interest at heart. Not only that, but it will trigger selfish behavior which will only put yourself in positions that are not a win for her. That’s an instant attraction killer and add to that the feeling of her not being safe around you.
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CONCLUSION
So, in conclusion, never be the asshole. There is nothing badass about breaking social norms in a negative way and being an insulting jerk. That will never get you anywhere in terms of being attractive to girls, or in life in general.
Be the challenging guy instead. Have your own sense of reality, surround yourself with cool, positive influences, don’t be needing anything from anyone, and just try to instigate fun wherever you go.
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