Being Introverted

2014-01-22T23:43:37+00:00

I'm extremely introverted to the point I don't want to go on dates

You're not introverted. Not many people are truly introverted, most people are a mix. In reality, going on dates is outside of your comfort zone and you're reluctant to leave it.

whenever I set a date up when the day comes I tend to always want to bail or don't want to go at all even though the girl is perfectly fine.

You enjoy the idea that you could get her, but you don't actually act on it because there's a chance it will ruin your self-image if the date goes poorly. It allows you to say, "yeah I could've gotten her if I tried, I just didn't lol". Essentially, you're afraid to make yourself vulnerable, and you're rationalizing by calling yourself introverted.

Any help?

Stop flaking. Push your comfort zone. That's it. The only thing you can really do is force yourself to act.

Remember that you're doing self-development. People with big metaphorical balls practice self-development. Therefore, you have big metaphorical balls. I'm not saying this as some bullshit, feel-good, afterschool special nonsense. I'm just stating a fact.

thehigheststatusmale · 2014-01-22T23:16:13+00:00

Sounds like excuses.

-XDerekX- · 2014-01-22T23:55:23+00:00

I've been a complete extrovert before and a complete introvert, I currently reside in-between and I have to say one of the more important factors in switching between them is finding out what activity you like to do. For example when I was an extrovert I always enjoyed going out and distracting myself and hanging out with friends cause I felt uncomfortable and unmotivated alone, I needed to go out to energize myself.

I went through a phase after where I started getting depressed because I couldn't keep myself happy and motivated and resorted to friends and going out, I started forcing myself to spend time alone but it wasn't till I developed an interest in reading, writing, and listening to music/playing music that I started becoming introverted and actually wanting time by myself to energize myself.

After a while of that I started focusing on a healthy medium, but to achieve such I had to find interests both by myself and with others, started doing activities with people other then just smoking weed and chilling (paintball, bowling, hockey games, ext) and found things myself that keep me busy and that inspire me. (still writing, reading, practicing guitar, ext)

What i'm saying is, if you don't like going on dates, change the date. If you go on casual (dinner and a movie) dates try something different. (golf, bowling, ext) But most importantly you need to find a social environment you enjoy more.

It's either that or you're gay.

freshairr · 2014-01-23T00:08:20+00:00

I think you like the chase of getting numbers and the 'high' that comes with it.

But also, you need to ask yourself why don't you want to go? Are you afraid she'll see you in a different light once you're 1 on 1? Why set up a date at all if you're going to eventually bail?

Title	Being Introverted
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	4
Date	January 22, 2014 10:53 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1vw3x5/being_introverted/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/being-introverted.1364852 https://theredarchive.com/post/1364852

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