Besides getting over approach anxiety, this is probably the most important thing in life: learn body language!

It's not about changing your body language, but learning how to read and react to other people's body language. Make it your life's mission.

While this might seem obvious or something we naturally do anyway, that isn't true.

For example, if the most beautiful woman you've ever seen (like jaw-droppingly beautiful) shows interest in you with her body language, chances are you'll brush it off. "No, she can't be interested in me. Why would she want anything to do with a loser like me?" But she does want you.

Another example, a guy gives you a look like he wants to kill you. Chances are, if he can get away with it, he would do exactly that. But like before we rationalize it away. "I'm sure he isn't that mad at me. I've done nothing to this guy." "What is he going to do to me? We live in a law-abiding society. I'll just ignore it." But, clearly, you should get away from that guy. (Plenty of people out there have gotten away with murder...)

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How do you read body language?

That's a good question as some of you might be saying:

But I don't know how to read body language, so how do I even react to it...

Sure, you could read YET ANOTHER book. But, honestly, you just have to put yourself out there. Your intuition is better than you think. And I even saw in a study saying that your ability to read other people's body language increases from simply interacting with them more (and interacting less with your computer). So just go interact with people. (Like I said, getting over your approach anxiety is probably the most important/the first step, but that's an entirely different post.)

Don't overthink it, just keep interacting with them.

But there is a mindset that can be very helpful for you, especially when it comes to reacting properly to body language...

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Focus on the other person.

In the PUA community, there is so much focus put on yourself and your own insecurities. We talk about inner game, affirmations, mirroring, body poses to use, etc. But focusing so much on ourselves can trip you up around those who already like you for you are. Instead, when you focus on the other person you take away all that nervousness and you can be in your best mode, your flow state.

The best and mot successful interactions I've ever had with a girl was from me being in the moment with her. I didn't use or could even think about any of that PUA stuff online. And I was able to be in the moment with her because I made it all about putting a smile on her face.

I think there is some self-help quote that says that all of life's problems come from trying to make ourselves happy, while all real happiness comes from making other people happy. Or as Zig Ziglar put it, "You can have everything in life you want, if you will just help other people get what they want."

Give people what they want. Go talk to that girl who is interested in you (even if she is super hot). Don't talk to that girl that finds you annoying (even if she is "beneath you" and you believe she should just be grateful that you are even talking to her). Heck, even the guy who wants to kill you is made happier when you get away from him as he doesn't have to see your face anymore.

Now, this isn't the be-all and end-all suggestion to living your life as there are definitely moral and ethical situations to consider, but, overall, this is how you should be approaching life. Even when it comes to sex...

Nina Hartley, who is often described by her male costars as being the best sex they ever had, said that following her sex advice to a T would bore a girl if you aren't focusing on her facial expressions as to what is giving her pleasure.

Do the same when you talk to people in conversation (especially girls).

I can't tell you how many times I've lost a girl who was clearly interested in me from the start because I had to try this dumb PUA technique or material found in a scientific study instead of focusing entirely on her. I tried to make it about me, my ego, and my insecurities by using stuff I found online to "ensure" my success instead of just being in the moment with her, instead of making the moment about her.

Always make it about her and her pleasure!!!

And she'll make it about yours later ;)

That's also how you move up in the world, even the business world. It's no coincidence that studies have found those who are socially intelligent (they can read and react to other people's body language the best) are often found at the top of businesses. You take care of people and people take care of you.

Focus on other people's problems, wants, and desires.

Reading people and reacting properly to people's body language (making other people happy) is the most important skill you'll ever learn.