Can I get an explanation or some good information on Hot and Cold method? Possibly known as hard to get

Girl is doing this. First day I text her, she discovers my interest because I flirted with her. Second and third day she barely texts, except for if I prompt a response, then it takes hours. Third day I catch on and start talking to other girls to keep me from falling into the trap, so I don’t talk much. Today, she texts me first after I view a Snapchat she sends me, and responds quickly with smilies and emojis, asking other questions and always sends the last text.

Currently I’m pissed at her and only sending professional school related texts and short texts.

If she’s going to keep making me lose, she can fuck right off because I morally stopped playing this game with girls when one of them told me how bad it made them feel.

I would like to know as much information as I can get on this topic, as well as how to counter it? I’ve heard you can’t really counter it, so at the least, how do I deal with it ( besides stop talking to her). Is there a way to get her to stop? I love the chase, but when she controls the entire aspect of timing and distracts me from school, I’d rather not deal with it.

[–]MFJones1[🍰] 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link

Info on hot/cold can be found in Robert Green's Art of Seduction. Google "Art of seduction pdf" and you'll find it. The chapter in Part 1 starting on page 67: "The Coquette" is specifically about seducers who use the hot/cold dynamic. In part two, chapters 3-7 address the hot/cold dynamic.

In general, the method for dealing with hot/cold is to do it right back while also being valuable. You must always appear to be a valuable and desirable person. You need to show that you're interested, but then disqualify her and end the interaction.

So keep those short, professional texts up. If she texts you something flirty or suggestive, respond with a "Nah, I'm good" sort of vibe. You need to see her in person to crack this nut. Engineer a social situation where you're both there and end up having a conversation. Say you're talking and flirting. She just said something flirty to you. You say "I can tell you think you're sexy and like to play games." And then walk away and do something else. You've already shown interest. You're not validating her by calling her sexy--you're saying she thinks she's sexy, which is slightly disqualifying. Then you call out her games without saying "Fuck you, you're teasing me!". If you do all this right, starting with a playful vibe and ending with a "see ya later, these girls over here look like fun" vibe, you should break the dynamic of her being in charge.

[–]garrypig[S] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]MFJones1[🍰] 1 point2 points3 points 8 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link

Three things in your post. 1)The book. 2) I seem awesome at this. 3) How do I know all this? I'll write a bit about all three. Then I'll point you towards a few other resources.

1) If you're interested in seduction, definitely read that book. It is a bridge between the academic theory of seduction and the practicing techniques of seduction. Sources like the books "Models", "Bang", and seduction blogs teach the specific techniques/tips/tricks of seduction. But all of these are routed in deeper, academic sources. They draw on principles of psychology, sociology, and evolutionary biology. The Art of Seduction is a bridge between the two. It doesn't give specific tips and it doesn't give you studies in psychology. It explains how the dynamics of the academic world turn into the practice of seduction. It does, however, provide many anecdotes that show some of the techniques in practice.

2) I do know a lot about this subject, but I am by no means an expert. I believe the information I've given you is very valid, but I am not am not player who runs around and slays pussy where ever it can be found. The true experts and innovative thinkers rarely comment here. They have their own blogs and forums, or they just don't bother at all. I tell you this just so you remember to take comments in perspective. If commenters really have all the answers and live the implied life, why are they here? Are they just good Samaritans? Possible, but unlikely. I know much more than you. But I have yet to put all my knowledge into practice. You may know less than me, but have practiced what you do know to a point that makes you much more attractive then me.

3) How do I know what I know? My journey in "seduction" and interpersonal dynamics in general started with Neil Strauss' "The Game". It is his story about entering the world of pick up artists. I highly recommend it. Not for tips about being a player, but to understand the ups and downs of the lifestyle. After that, I went through a bunch of manosphere, redpill, pua material. Blogs and books I could find online. I searched through /r/seduction and /r/redpill for the top blogs and books. Some of the RSD videos on youtube are pretty valuable as well.

Aside from seduction specific sources, what do I recommend you absorb? I'll recommend you two books.

The first is "The 48 laws of Power". This is written by Robert Greene -- the author of the previously recommended book The Art of Seduction. The 48 laws of power is by far the most valuable. When you read the words, you will feel the power in them. Every single chapter is extremely practical. It is full of anecdotes that give you examples of how the laws work. Rumor has it that this book is especially popular among rappers and convicts in prison. It is very applicable to your work environment.

The second book is "Influences: The Psychology of Persuasion" by Dr. Robert Cialdini. This is the best sales/persuasion book you could possibly read. The most famous sales books is Dale Carnegie's "How to Make Friends and Influence People". That book does have a lot of value. But it doesn't feel extremely practical. It comes down to: show a genuine appreciation for other people. Cialdini's book breaks down every single sales technique you've ever heard of into 6 psychology principles. It gives you a framework to understand ever other sales/persuasion book you've ever read.

[–]garrypig[S] 0 points1 point2 points 8 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link

Title	Can I get an explanation or some good information on Hot and Cold method? Possibly known as hard to get
Author	garrypig
Upvotes	2
Comments	5
Date	October 14, 2017 5:36 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/76dirk/can_i_get_an_explanation_or_some_good_information/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/can-i-get-an-explanation-or-some-good-information.1435273 https://theredarchive.com/post/1435273

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