difficulty escalating and making a move

Bigjohnthug · 2016-04-25T23:49:26+00:00

Yeah this is probably one of the three or four sticking points 99.99% of guys go through. Which means you should get lots of good advice.

Mine would be that there is two elements to escalation: getting the girl receptive and pulling the trigger. The second is just raw confidence so I'll focus on the first. You need to build off the natural undercurrent of sexual tension so as to put her in a sexually responsive state. You want her to start giving you those subtle signals she wants you to make a move- twirling her hair, crossing and uncrossing her legs, asking you what you're doing later tonight, looking at your lips, etc. Sometimes you won't ever get those signs, which is even more confusing, but most the time as long as the attraction is there (meaning she isn't turned off by you) and you build that tension, then she will be fairly obvious. The thing is as soon as you think "ok she wants the kiss" its probably the last possible moment, because you're inexperienced and likely missed most of the signals. So go for it then and there. Don't worry about being smooth, smooth guys get numbers, guys with balls get laid.

Building sexual tension is basically just take things very slow, be deliberate with your words and actions, hold eye contact and think about how good she'll feel pressed against you. It's scary to do at first but the rejections you get from behaving this way are shockingly the least bad. Acting like an ADHD RSD instructor may get you yelled at/slapped/glassed, but the worst I have ever gotten from this is "I'm not interested please stop talking to me." She was ugly and I was warming up. Usually they're really nice about it and even offer their friends.

L3T · 2016-04-28T06:53:02+00:00

I also have this problem. Before ever having initiated any flirting or making kino or moves I have been labelled as sleezy and girls have flat out thought I was after them when I actually had NO intentions. Which makes me generally become insecure and always try too hard to come across as mr. genuine 'nice guy', ie. Non sleezy. BUt diddly squat that helps when it comes time for me to actually make a move on a girl that I like. FML

Title	difficulty escalating and making a move
Author	sds0098
Upvotes	2
Comments	2
Date	April 25, 2016 11:06 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4gfzbj/difficulty_escalating_and_making_a_move/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/difficulty-escalating-and-making-a-move.1405917 https://theredarchive.com/post/1405917

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