I've been meeting girls through OKCupid lately, and I've been following a formula: pay for any date under $10, pay for any first date under $30 if I like the girl. If the girl offers to split the check, I usually make a joke about how I'd be making her pay if I wasn't having fun and flash her a grin.

I use that to establish that I'm not trying to buy her affection, that paying for her comes from a place of generosity and not desperation, and that she has to work to keep my attention if she wants to keep me around.

I'm wondering if I should pay for dates after the first, or if that sends a message that I'm trying too hard to win her over. Alternatively, would splitting the bill indicate that I'm cheap or not interested in her?

For example, lets say my first date I went out for drinks, didn't k-close, but lots of kino and built attraction. Second date I ask her out to a movie and dinner + drinks after. Should I pay for the movie and dinner, just the dinner, or just the movie? I'm thinking I could say something like "I'll let you buy my movie ticket, but I'm going to pay for dinner whether you like it or not".