This girl used to dance with me and we met occasionally in salsa/bachata parties. I asked her out once but she refuses. This shit happened months ago and I don't remember when.

Let's call her pam.

Pam met me at the old Irish pub at Copenhagen. I approached her "I know you!nice to meet you" She acknowledged my approach and starts talking. She says she got ditched by her friend so she is here. I told her"cool, I here by myself, you are here, let's have a fun night "

I told her how the 90s party was good. Told her would love to dance salsa to the 90 s party. She agrees. We dance together. She is being touchy. I am enjoying the music and the vibe. She is trying to copy my moves. We have fun. She still sees me as a friend. I did not put a man to woman frame from the beginning.

We find a table and sit down to chat. I tell her about Louis 16 not taking a bath. She says French people are not like that and that her people are actually clean. She is qualifying at this moment. Some Danish douche comes and sits at our table.he asks if we are a couple. I say"yes,we have been dating for an year and this is our 176th date"laughs.She consoles the guy and says "no,we are not a couple and we are definitely not dating",while putting a hand on my shoulders.

I get the vibe that she is not interested.but I am hopeful that things will go well.He tries to get a reaction out of me. I simply smile and start texting my friend while I wait for their conversation to inevitably end. She looks at me who doesn't care at this moment. He fucks off.

She suggests we dance again and also suggests for some beer. I refuse saying, "I hate beer and I don't have the money for wine. so get me some water."

Then we see a guy approach us, does some weird ass dance and when he sees me with her, chodes out. She mentions that she likes him but is afraid to approach him and she knows him and whenever she is with some dude,he thinks I am dating that guy"

This triggered me so much. I told her that she should approach that guy. I had subconsciously made up my mind that "she doesn't like me, all I am going to get is a goodbye hug even if I stay longer, so better make her hook up with that chode" I encourage her to pursue him. She says "yeah! ,but what if blah blah blah..."

She tries to hug me. I back off. She says" This is awkward "I was like, "why?you like that dude more,then what the fuck is this?" She: but everyone thinks that we are a couple

I am like"WHAT THE FUCK? fuck everyone "

She tries to get touchy with me. She places her hand over my shoulder. But I just take her hand and lead her to the dance floor where we basically rock some awesome bachata dance moves.

Then I lead her to the table where I read her hands and predict her future husband is going to be very handsome and that he might be here in the bar. She laughs. I tell her it is time for her to find him. She resists. I was being a loser and led her to him.

Man, I have this belief that I have to be the guy, who will help everyone. But if it comes at this price of me cutting my own balls off, nope nope nope.

I lead her to him, she talks to him and I fuck off to find my jacket which I find after 30 mins. I felt shit after that. But Pam was shit too, because she didn't make her intentions clear with me.

Lesson learned: either escalate quickly or fuck off. Don't be the guy who is scared to escalate. I have this sticking point.