Yo guys. I've been lurking for a few months and have to compliment you all the mentality and ideology you are promoting.

Let me give you some background about the environment and myself. My school isn't exactly the most conducive to pick-ups and hook-ups. The ratio is god awful: 70% guys. But that's not surprising because it is a tech school. This means that any girl instantly gets rated higher than she actually is. Not to mention that because of the ratio, there is some form of Ratio Induced Bitch Syndrome/Golden Pussy Syndrome. On top of that a lot of guys are your typical forever alone making the ladies very wary of who they hook up with.

Now I am smack dab in the center. I'm quite normal, but at the same time very geeky (I'm a programmer so naturally I'm really on good with computers). I can easily have a conversation with anybody and am very confident in myself and my abilities. I'm comfortable in any situation. Yet I have a fair amount of AA and being in a place with so much competition its seeming hard to overcome. But any worth it is never easy to obtain right? Not to mention that my school is very small so I've met and/or know a very decent part of the population and have already been friend zoned by most to oblivion. I'm also working full time (the co-op/intern program at my school) and am a professional web designer & programmer. So I have virtually no free time to go do anything.

So here goes. I try to advantage of my weekends when I can, I work way to much. Since I'm good friends with a lot of brothers from the different fraternities I automatically have social proof where ever I go. The ratio at parties is never important because everybody knows its not going to happen.

Early Friday night there is a dance party sponsored by a fraternity and the campus radio station. Since its co-sponsored by the radio station, immediately all the forever alone type kids show up. But since I know everybody, its a good time and I use the fun to get into state. I text my friend (who I've already been friend zoned by) to ask her when we're going over to the fraternities. She says they're hanging out at one right now and I say that I still haven't heard Daft Punk so I'll come over once I do.

The party we plan on going to is a toga party. But as expected (for my school) no one, except the brothers, are wearing togas. This leads me to take my shirt off. Who gives a shit right? No one. Though because of another party going on, this one is quite lame (the weird kid dance party was more fun, no joke). After hanging out there, we move over to the other party and we're all quite happy to see that this party is MUCH better in every regard. I haven't seen one of the brothers there in a long while so I'm moving my way through the crowd asking other brothers I know where this guy is.

In my journey, I stumble upon a group of girls I know. Because it's a masquerade there is no way I could recognize them, but they do and the one immediately shouts my name. I pretend to have trouble figuring out who it is (I recognize the voice) and chat up the girl standing next to me (that I don't know, also now an "accidental" target). Another girl in the group I rarely talk to asks if I recognize her and I say of course I do! Then she goes off on something about how its a good thing I remember because we met at another party and I say something about how my memory is awesome. So I've built up social proof with the target who is probably an HB5.5-6 meaning she's a perfect 10 on the scale used at my school (really, any girl is).

I continue on my search for my friend and am really just walking around without a shirt on talking to random people here and there. I find him and have a short chat then I go back to having a good time dancing around by myself like a buffoon (I am by no means drunk or buzzed). Then because of the smoke machine the fire alarm goes off. Half the party moves to the toga party and here comes to meat of this [FR].

I get back to the toga party, go to the basement to get a drink and find that same group of girls. I start talking to the girl I don't know again. After 30 seconds to a minute I'm dancing like a buffoon again so she starts moving, turns around a little and immediately we're dancing. Just to recap I've talked to her for a grand total of less than 5 minutes. So I don't know anything about her and she knows nothing about me (except for what she's inferred character and personality wise). We dance for about a half hour and by now the basement is getting really fucking hot so I suggest we go upstairs.

A note here: I notice though every time I touch her hand she's a little reluctant to reciprocate, which I have a good feeling is an IOD. But that was the only one I received. She warmed up a little to it, but remained a little reluctant.

Now I had the intention of sitting down on the couch up there but she wanted to dance more and who am I argue with that? After a little bit she says going over to the other side of the room to dance with her girlfriends, gives me a kiss on the cheek and heads on over.

During this time I talk to other people I know. Just catching up with people I haven't seen in a while and talking about the fraternity I'm trying to start. I notice that my girl started dancing with another guy but I really don't care much, I just keep talking to the people I'm talking to. Eventually I see her standing around with some people and our eyes meet so I give her a little smirk (like a "there you are ;)" kind of thing), stop moving for a second, and then walk on over. She says that her and some friends are going to over to another fraternity and asks if I have my phone. I first ask her name and I get first name so I ask first name what? She says last initial to which I response "Last name too hard to spell?" And she gives me her last name and number. I have a feeling this might have also been IOD but I think I played it off in a way that was beneficial to the situation.

She leaves and I stay for another 10 minutes and shoot her a text saying that I forgot to mention that my name was iamnotanerd. She texts back with "O hey iamnotanerd" and I reply with "O hey HB6". And then nothing which I'm not surprised, I only talked to this girl for 5 minutes. That's why I texted her so soon. If we had more conversation I would have waited until the next day or day after (thoughts on texting so soon?).

Right now its about midnight-12:30 and I go to bed since I need to be up early for a frisbee tournament that weekend. That's a why I didn't go to the other fraternity with her. I wake up to a text from her at 1:37 asking how the party I was at was. Unfortunately I was sleeping and didn't get it because I'm sure something more might have happened if I did. I respond saying I actually left not long after she did because of a frisbee tournament (my attempt to DHV) and didn't get anything back. I text her later in the day asking how the party she went to was, and again, nothing.

So here are my thoughts. I should have tried to k-close while I was dancing with her. Then isolation would have been easier and she probably wouldn't have gone to the other fraternity. I wanted to but felt the lack of hand contact made it hard for me to get her to turn around. I did have good kino during this and am getting better and better at it.

My questions are:

  • What are the IOI's and IOD's here? Did I correctly recognize them?
  • Is the lack of conversation something to worry about or does it not really matter? I'm always one to get to know people and I enjoy that, but I feel it may come across as a little too beta...
  • How can I approach texting her? Even if nothing comes out of it (I'm not expecting anything and never have in the past), I at least want to expand my social circle.

Thanks for reading guys. I hope you all enjoyed your weekends.