Last night was the best pickup of my life, even though I only got a number. Writing this down will help me remember what I did, and maybe you guys can give me some pointers. For background, I'm in a relationship that's only recently become an open relationship (we live half a country apart), and I've only recently been trying to do pickup while avoiding canned conversations entirely, which worked for me most of the time but failed spectacularly sometimes. TL;DR: I flirted with a girl all night who I would have assumed was WAY out of my league.

Last night I looked better than I have in awhile. I've been working out a ton with a single giant barbell, I've been taking vitamin D which seems to help muscle mass, and I've lost a little weight. My outfit last night was sharp, and consciously tailored to mimic the guy who introduced me to Neil Strauss got me into pickup, who since left town.

I got to the bar with two friends, and lingered there, while pausing to watch the the band. I gave the crowd a bored glance, but didn't look at anyone otherwise. We bought a pitcher, played a round of pool, and I only looked at, laughed with, and talked to my friends. I was aware of a bunch of hot girls near us. I knew there was a hot redhead at the bar near the pool table, but I didn't know how hot because I didn't even look at her. I decided I was going to open her within the first ten minutes of entering the bar, so I put myself near her.

I don't even remember how I opened her, or if it was even her who opened me, which would be surprising cause I'm not that attractive. Suddenly I was talking to her about her playing "dirty pool" in Ecuador. I gave her a smile and a bored glance, then I intentionally did a once over on her smoking hot curves, eyed her her cleavage, and then smiled at her and said I could see how she would be good and dirty pool and asked her what the best techniques for distraction were.

Then we talked about Spanish, and her being a teacher, and how all her male middle school students had crushes on her, and stuff like that. She had a couple of good stories and I laughed and complimented her on them, remembering a line I heard on reddit recently: Smart girls like it when you tell them they're pretty, and pretty girls love it when you compliment them on being smart and interesting. During the first 15 minutes of conversation, my body was turned away from her and I only made occasional eye contact. She said she never went to bars, but her friends were the two smoking hot girls belly dancing on stage with the band. As we talked more, I acted more interested in her, and started making a lot of eye contact. I didn't talk about myself at all in the first 20 minutes, and I felt like I should have been. So when she asked me about myself, I decided to be evasive and make her guess what I did. It took her like 10 minutes to get it, and she was demanding I tell her, but I just acted frustrated and refused because if she had tried that long, she better get it. I acted really excited and interested in my job and I talked alot about how liked teaching too. She initiated kino, and I responded very slowly escalating it. Pretty soon my arm was on her back, her hand was on my knee while she excitedly told stories. We talked for an entire hour, before she let the bomb drop that she had a boyfriend.

I felt like the guy on a British sitcom who drops the fishtank he's carrying for a girl the moment she mentions her boyfriend. I was so excited and turned on by her, and I wanted to sleep with her so much, that I just felt angry and bitter that she had taken so long to tell me. My instinct was to jet and go for one of the the other girls near us who had seen me talking to her, since i already had female validation. But, then I thought, what the hell, why do I feel cheated? I made her buy her own drink, even though she seemed to fish for one, and I genuinely enjoyed talking to her. I felt like the most successful, popular kid in high school who had the hottest girl hanging on my arm. My friends were wide-eyed, and refilled my cup from the pitcher when it got low, but otherwise gave me space. All her signals had been IOIs and she was still playing with her hair and touching me.

And then I thought, what would seddit do? And I realized that I had been in great frame all night, and I decided to just stay in frame. So I made up my mind that I wasn't going to ditch her, but talk with her for the rest of the night. I figured someone good at pickup could close on her, and even though I wasn't, I could at least act like I was someone good at pickup, and get used to being in the happy, successful, too cool for most people except maybe, just maybe, you head space.

So we kept talking, she talked about her bf, who was depressed and recently fired. We talked about her ex who was crazy and possessive. We talked about dancing, and I had her show me some Argentine tango close embrace moves. And she kept her arm on me and kept looking into my eyes while I acted like she some harmless, longtime friend.

Finally, after 45 minutes she acted like she had been dying to say something. "I have something to tell you: my boyfriend and I have an open relationship, and I date other guys sometimes. I'm a hedonist and I LOVE sex, and he can't keep up with me. But, in the last year, I've only had two other boyfriends then him, but both of those flings crashed and burned after a few weeks because they fell in love with me. Most guys get all doey-eyed when they meet me, and every guy I sleep with falls for me and says I'm the best girl he's ever been with, and gets all possessive. But you seem really cool!" I thanked her and told her about my relationship... suddenly I was the guy who was aloof enough to solve her problem of guys being way too into her.

I gotta go, so I can't write about the rest, but she insisted on giving me her number, and I'm planning to text her today to ask her what that one dance place was.

Update: I texted her asking for the name of the dance hall she mentioned. She sent me two texts the next morning with two different dancehalls that she and her gfs go to on Thursday and Fridays. I think asking an easy-to-answer question really helps with getting a response. I haven't texted her back yet, but plan to soon.