I wrote extensively about my interaction with this girl in my previous post here: http://www.reddit.com/r/askseddit/comments/2oe0yd/need_feedback_on_text_convo_long/

I completely forgot about her until after Christmas and sent out a probe message to meet up for lunch. At that time she was in a different province and wasn’t coming back until January 9th. We set something tentative up for when she comes back and I forgot about her again. About a week ago she reached out to me to see if we are having lunch and we decided to meet for drinks on Saturday. I changed the plans a bit last minute because I never seem to do well in a “drinks at a bar” setting so we went for a mini picnic (mostly wine) and a walk. Everything was smooth throughout the night, made out about an hour into the date, and then decided to get some food.

This is when her ASD began kicking in. We did end up going to a lounge, grabbed a few beers, and the conversation turned towards sex and etc. Out of the blue she just blurts out that she doesn’t have sex on first dates. I amplify and say that I have a rule where I don’t have sex until date #25 and make the whole thing into a big joke. On our way back to where we both live I suggest going to my place for a few more drinks and then to head out to the bar right near my house to dance. This is when she straight up tells me that she isn’t banging me tonight. I ignore this one under the pretences that I need to call my roommate and find out what he is up to.

Once at my place and the going gets heavy, she just pulls away, tells me it isn’t happening, and starts apologizing (sigh…Canadians). This is when I screwed up a bit and tried to rationalize it with her (i.e. it’s natural, we are attracted to each other, why not?, etc). All that it managed to accomplish is give her more time to think and find a way out. This went on back and forth for a while – we would make out and grind, then she would pull away. Finally she says that she needs to go and she will order a cab. Not wanting to lose this chance to finally close a girl on first date, I tell her I will make her as horny as she made me and then she can leave. After some more foreplay I just get off her and order her a cab. I got to thank this cabby for the assist - he is a real bro. He didn’t show in 5 minutes like the dispatcher said and by the 6th minute she was in my bed. I don’t know what finally did it for her…the fact that I was willing to let her walk away or my persuasiveness…or she simply wanted to fuck.

Note to self: don’t let the alcohol take control of you. At our second venue I was a little bit tipsy and definitely lost some frame with all of my blabbering.

Lastly, I need to get better at sex. I am either the marathon man one night or a two-pump chump the next. I need consistency as well as to get better at/enjoy oral sex. Going down on a girl was ruined for me by my first sex partner – she had a fishy smell about her that was off putting but I didn’t know that all vaginas aren’t supposed to smell that way. What can I read up on outside of kegal exercises?