Occasionally, I see posts wondering about whether or not seduction is a viable way to find someone you can actually start a relationship with, rather than just a method for picking up women you can sleep with as easily as possible. Now, I've always been of the mind that seduction can be a tool used to whichever purpose you so desire. This FR will demonstrate how you can use it to work towards an actual relationship with someone.

During my Day 2 with this girl, we decided that she'd come down to see me over the long weekend. She'd come down Friday night and then leave Sunday afternoon. Since we spent an extremely long time together, I won't be able to write down every single little thing we did or a lot of specific details and techniques, but I'll try to give a good overview.

Friday

I picked her up at the train station after work and we went to my place. Sat around making out pretty heavily for awhile, but I told her we didn't have "enough time" for anything else because we were having dinner with my friends. I invited a group of my friends out for a dinner at a really good restaurant right behind my apartment. Around 9 PM, my friends showed up at my place and we went out to eat. The dinner was really good and the conversation was better. Lesson: Don't just go out for dinner. Go out for the BEST dinner. Know the best restaurants in your area. If it's someone you're looking to go for a relationship, introduce her to friends. Get their opinions. See how they interact. It'll be a big red flag if she can't get along with your friends.

Afterward, we went to the bar area and met up with another group of people I could introduce her to. She spent time on her own doing "girl time" with my friends. I got to socialize on my own. We'd come together occasionally, but not for very long. All I heard from my friends was how much they liked her, how cool she was, etc... and she said she really liked my friends, so everything was going well. We left pretty early, maybe 2 AM, and went home, but she was too tired from getting up at 6 AM and traveling to do anything, so that's how our night ended. Lesson: Once again, friends, friends, friends. Most importantly, have female friends. It only makes you look better to have good looking female friends that you can enjoy time with platonically. It also gives her the opportunity to socialize normally without you.

Saturday

We woke up and F-closed. Really good physical chemistry. Another really important factor. Sometimes you can really be into somebody, but without sexual chemistry, shit just isn't there. We tried going out for lunch, but most shit was closed due to the holiday. Finally settled on a burger joint, then went home. Watched a couple movies I had told her about that she seemed interested in, and she ended up loving them. Also, more sexy times ensued. Lesson: Be knowledgeable about something. I know that my apartment doesn't have a lot of super interesting shit to do in it, but I know a lot about movies, so I was able to keep her entertained for the couple hours between lunch and going out. Still, watching movies don't cut it forever. Something I gotta work on.

We went out for an Indian dinner with my two closest friends, then went back out to the bars. For awhile, the bar was quiet and it was just a good conversation time, but a birthday party of about 20 people I know from around down came in, and it picked up and became a lot more social. Unfortunately, the food did a real bad number on my stomach and we ended up leaving the bar really early to go home.

Sunday

As it was Lunar New Year, pretty much everything in my city was closed, so it was a whole stay inside day. I made pancakes and omelettes for breakfast. We ended up F-closing and taking a nap after that. Woke up around 5 PM and I made dinner. We watched some movies and just sat around for awhile. She ended up changing her mind and saying that she would skip the train she had already bought a ticket for and go home on Monday instead so she could spend more time with me. Unfortunately, my stomach was still in pretty bad shape from the food the night before, so more sexy times were not to be had Sunday. Lesson: In addition to being knowledgeable about cool places, acquiring some kind of skill is a very attractive thing. And it doesn't have to be to an artisan level either, just knowing how to do one specific thing well is impressive. I wouldn't consider myself an amazing cook by any means, but she was impressed with my omelettes because she always has failed at making them herself. Dinner was just chicken fried rice with veggies. Cooking is a pretty easy skill to obtain, and it's crazy useful for you anyway, aside from dating. I'd recommend knowing how to cook 3-5 dishes and being comfortable doing them.

Monday

Went out for lunch at the place I wanted to go Saturday. She was impressed with the restaurant. Went back to my place and F-closed. Here is where some important stuff happened. I put all my cards on the table and told her that while I wasn't really looking for a relationship in general, I recognized that she was the kind of person I'd stop being single for. I asked her what she wanted, and she wasn't really sure, but she said "I don't want you to see other people, and I don't want to see other people, but I don't want a relationship." Rather than bug her about it, I just said okay and let it go. Maybe half an hour later, I looked at the to-do list on my refrigerator and she had written "Visit my girlfriend in X." I asked her if that's what she really wanted, and she said yes, so we made it "official". Lesson: Be honest about what you want. If you don't get the answer you want right away, it's not a big deal. I told her if she didn't want to answer right away that's fine. If you're at this point with a girl, no reason to blow it right on the goal line by getting upset if she can't commit to anything right away.

I made a joke about being "Facebook official" and she said she "never does that". It's not anybody's business, apparently. But then she asked if mine said I was single, and I said yes. She told me "I don't want to say I'm in a relationship on Facebook... But I don't want yours to say you're single..." I just said okay and stopped talking. We watched The Walking Dead and I didn't bring it up again. She ended up changing it on my profile herself. We F-closed again.

Afterward, we were talking about things, like how she doesn't do "Facebook official" or how she had wanted to leave early on the second date and planned to leave early on Sunday. She admitted that she really liked me, but was afraid she was building it up to be more than it was in her mind and something would go wrong, but I continued to constantly surprise her by making each date better than the last. I think everyone who's done any reading on seddit knows the importance of physical escalation, but I also think the importance of emotional escalation is understated here. Now, for the purposes of hooking up with girls in bars, it's not really necessary, aside for a bit of comfort and attraction to lay a baseline to work from, but when you want an honest relationship with a girl, you can't keep her at arm's length. Being cool and aloof can get a girl interested in you, but I'm not entirely show how long it'll keep her interested. Lesson: Once you meet someone you're genuinely interested in, you have to let them know it. Don't just show them the "bar you". Saturday morning she made a joke about never seeing me in the day before. Let a girl know there's more than just the "date you". You've got to show her more than one side of you. Just as lots of PUA suggest not drinking so you don't use alcohol as a crutch for your game, I suggest you work on your game outside of the "dating scene". You can't afford to only be "in state" when you're out with the mindset of picking up a girl.

Now I've got plans to go see her in her area next weekend, and in two weeks, she's coming back down here for a big party weekend. Things are looking real good for me.