Getting back in the game

give_him_room_hooper · 2014-10-13T17:19:24+00:00

As has been said a few times already in this thread, the best thing to do is just dive in head-first, and start talking to girls whenever you can. If you just go for it and keep talking to girls, the fear/anxiety will subside as you become more comfortable.

However, there are good and bad ways to go about this. Don't get drunk (at least not very) when you do it. You'll want to be sober-ish (having a SLIGHT buzz may be okay if you really need it to spur you on and help a bit) so that it's YOU that's talking and gaining the experience, and so that you don't start to use booze as a crutch to meet people.

I personally think that a good way to start talking to strange, new girls, is to start out by talking to girls that you AREN'T interested in (or at least have the mindset that when you're talking to a new girl, you aren't looking for sex, a date, or even a number). Just approach it as a new person to interact with. Baby steps.

Next time you're at a bar, make it a point to say hello to a stranger or start some light, meaningless conversation. Keep the interaction short, say "it was great meeting you," and move on. Don't ask for a number or anything (unless you just really built up a good rapport), and go do it again with the next person. And don't limit yourself to only girls. If you step outside the bar for a smoke or something, and hear guys talking about a game you watched or whatever, chip in with some light convo. "Did you see that interception he threw? What was he thinking!?" Something like that. Then say "okay, I'm headed back in, see ya." Or if it's a place known for a wide selection of beers, ask someone nearby for a recommendation or if they've tried [fill in blank] brewery's seasonal, and if you should give it a try. Then say "thanks" and move on.

Do enough of this kind of stuff and you'll accomplish a couple of things. One is that you'll loosen up and see that talking to strange people isn't a big deal, and another is that maybe you'll make a new friend and/or gain some social approval, get introduced to new people via your newfound acquaintances, etc.

Once you feel more comfortable chatting up new people and girls in low-pressure ways (I'm referring to pressure you may put on yourself to get a result such as a phone number, kiss, etc.), then you can start to focus more on meeting women for romantic purposes.

This is by no means exhaustive or flawless, and anyone else can feel free to jump in and disagree or add upon it, but I think it's a decent starting point. And the last bit of advice is to have fun, and make sure whatever you're doing, you're doing for YOU. Make sure you're happy with yourself no matter what the result is, and other people will pick up on that and respond well to it.

estrbsktofdoomV3 · 2014-10-13T12:52:46+00:00

Just do it. Throw yourself in it and eventually things become easier. I think I am saying this because I need to throw myself into day game this week.

evolve1337 · 2014-10-13T13:07:09+00:00

There's no secret magic. Just go and do it even though it goes against your subconcious feeling.

2014-10-13T13:21:06+00:00

I'm right there with you. There is no shortcut to confidecne. I believe you have to fail over and over until you don't give a shit about rejection. Once you'vr mastered that then you can be as confident as you want.

NeoSamwell · 2014-10-13T15:45:30+00:00

Work on building Inner Game.

Title	Getting back in the game
Author	NobodyLikesPricks
Upvotes	10
Comments	6
Date	October 13, 2014 11:28 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/2j3vf8/getting_back_in_the_game/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/getting-back-in-the-game.1377949 https://theredarchive.com/post/1377949

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