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[–]SoWaS 4 points5 points6 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Getting her back is an absolutely irrelevant question to be asking right now. All of your time and attention needs to be spent on YOURSELF, not some broad. I would strongly recommend seeing a therapist, given the situations that have happened, the help you need is far beyond book recommendations or suggestions from people over the internet.
Needing and getting help is never a bad thing. Don't feel like it is. However with out said help, all of the relationships you have in the future are going to follow this same pattern. You need to focus on loving your self and that you are worth it. Having trust and jealously issues are very difficult; even with a good therapist may never leave or will take many years to be cleared up, but by being more self aware there are several exercises you can do to recognize these behaviors as they happen and with a little bit of will power you can avoid making them a known issue or experiencing the negative thoughts and paranoia's that accompany them.
Seriously, see a licensed professional. You are only 21 man, you have so much of a future ahead of you, don't give up on your self or life. Do the honorable thing and walk away from this chick, don't put her through anymore hardship. If you absolutely feel you have to let her know you're sorry, you're going to be ok, but right now you need to focus on your life and to respect your decision for you two to cut contact. Remove her from all social media, and out of your phone. Ideally you should just delete or disable all of your social media accounts. You need to find and love your self, you can't do that online. Spend more time in nature and with men you admire and look up to. Design the man you want to become in every little detail you can think of, and every single day no matter how small of a way, just make sure you do one thing to get closer to becoming that man. I also suggest keeping a journal, and writing down any thoughts as they happen.
TL;DR: Cease contact with the girl, focus on your self and get the help of a mental professional.
[–]FenniLongFang 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The thing is I got over that issues, I really learned my lesson and I realized the core of the problems that I had, everything now is going fine except.. with this girl, I really want to be with her back, as I said earlier - there are no other problems except this one
[–][deleted] 9 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]FenniLongFang 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I already heard this from all the people that I talked about, I am not asking how to get over it, I am looking for ways how to get her back, I already analized everything and got up to the conclusion that she is the girl that I really want to be with
[–][deleted] 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]FenniLongFang 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
How should I approach it? Should I not talk to her at all, or what should I do? I need to show her that I changed regarding to the self-harm behaviour (and I really did) but there is no other way to show her except interacting with her
[–]Endoss 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You will never have a happy relationship with this woman. Do yourself a favor and move on to the next chapter of your life.
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[–]SoWaS 4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]FenniLongFang 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]FenniLongFang 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]FenniLongFang 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Endoss 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link